Appleton Estate Gold
Jamaican Rum ($12.99 for 750ML)
Emily, Wharton '17: It’s like I set my tongue on fire. And then maybe ate gravel?
Alex, College '15: Uncomfortably sweet, like a very awkward smile.
Ryan, College '15: Tastes like ass. A mouthwash good for an enema.
Ho Sun, Wharton '16: I would take shot of this at a Thursday pre–game and pretend it’s good.
SCORE: 5/10
Don Q Cristal Rum ($12.99 for 750ml) ON SALE!
Emily: This is the situation where I’d say 'I can’t even taste the alcohol in my drink anymore.'
Alex: A slap to the face. Pretty harsh.
Ryan: Looks like vodka, kinda tastes like vodka. It’s not bad. I’d fuck with this. (Eds. Note: He still spit it out.)
Ho Sun: Is this vodka? I'd drink it straight if it was a late–night, no–more–chaser type situation.
SCORE: 6.5/10
Gosling’s Black Bermudan Rum ($18.99 for 750ML)
Emily: I think they put this in my broth at Ramen Bar. It kinda has that salty soy sauce after–taste.
Alex: tastes cheap and dirty, like a sleazy Caribbean bar
Ryan: Smells like maple syrup, tastes like toffee–a burny, horrible toffee.
Ho Sun: I would enjoy this when I’m eighty and can’t taste properly anymore.
SCORE: 4/10
Banker’s Club Gold Rum ($13.99 for 1.75L)
Emily: No bartender would serve that to you, even if you say “Whichever, I don’t care.”
Alex: Maybe Russians would drink this, when there’s no vodka.
Ryan: Doesn’t smell like anything. No wait, it kinda has a pee smell. Tastes and looks like half–piss, half–Vlad.
Ho Sun: This is only consumed shamefully. There’s no other way to do it.
SCORE: 2/10
