In the land of England there is a summer alcoholic beverage unparalleled in taste, merriness and drunkenness–making. It’s what Will and Kate drink at the garden parties, while Prince Harry is riding around on his pretty pony playing polo. It’s what the Queen knocks back quickly behind a curtain before she appears in front of cheering crowds (of American tourists coming to Buckingham Palace). They drink it at the cricket matches and on the boats that sail past Big Ben on the Thames. It’s Pimms.

Americans may have won the war, but you’ll be missing out on a beverage far superior to tea if you don’t put Pimms on your Fling shopping list. Your upperclassmen bros can drink it outside on their ugly couches outside of the frat house. Your senior sorority sisters can sip it while they sunbathe. And with the help of our superbly simple recipe, you can impress your British–accented crush with a tasty reminder of home. Just don’t give ‘em Pimms on a rainy day, or they might collapse with homesickness.

If you’re going to do Pimms, you better do it right, so that you can avoid perverting another of the motherland’s fine traditions. The Pimms sold in America is Pimms No. 1, and is itself a unique form of gin that has a deep reddish tint, like good, strong, dark English tea. Pimms refers to both the alcohol on its own and the sparklingly beautiful beverage that you can prepare:

To become that cool, cocktail–making kid you’ve always wanted to be, grab some container that will hold liquid and pour in one part Pimms (teaspoon, cup, gallon) to two parts tonic water or soda (Sprite might have to do...). Then you get funky—cutting up fresh fruits like apples, strawberries and oranges. Add a hint of mint (to make up for not brushing your teeth over Fling), and a few chunks of lemon and cucumber (yes, the English are weird). Finish with a dash of ice and you’ve got yourself something very special indeed.