Remember that one time when the Snapchat ghost (what ghost?) was a symbol of how you could send a message without it being screenshotted? I don’t either, but for every Snapchat we do screenshot, there are hundreds that we’ve speedily tapped through. From sexts to food (food sexts too), Snapchat has seen it all–and so has Street. We give you the rundown of every snap you’re likely to see this summer.


Snaps from New York: You love the Hamptons. You’ve used the Upper East Side and Soho filter every (other) snap. You use that one “subtle” filter that makes it seem like everything is a little bit clearer and a little bit more enhanced, but let’s be real: your brunch eggs aren’t that natural color.

Snaps from abroad: At this point, the Eiffel Tower is as impressive as the dick pics the bro you hooked up with back home keeps snapping you.

Snaps from celebrities: I’m invested in how much you seem to genuinely care about me as a person you’ll probably never think about, but at this point I only hear the “you” in “you guys.” (I love you too.) Please respond to my snaps. 

Snaps from internships: “Yes? Is this Human Resources? So, one of your interns keeps Snapchatting about how bored they are…”

Snaps from that one friend that only posts at parties: Your liver is fucked, dude. Please stop screaming. What time do you sleep?

Snaps from that one friend that only posts food: You love gourmet food. You love being adventurous. You aren’t afraid to dabble in some street food, either (as long as it’s on Spruce and has got good reviews on Yelp). The close-ups of your food is amazing. But, I just saw your snap at 2 am, and I am hungry NOW.

Snaps from that one friend who only uses the dog filter: We are all this friend. Stop lying. (Ed. note: That's a little ruff.)

Snaps from that one friend who only uses the skin-clearing filters: Your crush can still see your acne. 

Snaps from that one friend that only posts aesthetic snaps: We get it. You have a lot of time on your hand to curate a collection of 10-second or less snapchats onto your story. You perfectly lined up the text in the middle. Everything is in focus. Are your priorities?

Snaps from that one friend that zooms in on everything: Okay, it’s still funny.

Snaps from that one friend that only posts selfies: You look good today. You’re feeling yourself. You’ve got your hair done. You’ve got your face beat. You missed that small piece of eye crust in the corner of your left eye.

Snaps from that one friend that always hits the 4:20 mark: But do you vape?

Snaps from that one friend that’s home all summer: Keep reclaiming Netflix and chill one ridiculously complex and emotional Scandal season at a time.

Snaps from the group of people that all saw the same beautiful sunset: Surprisingly, I too have eyes. Unsurprisingly, I was inside and consistently don’t know when the sunset is.

Snaps from those dog accounts everyone should follow: Post more.


What these all say about us: Work hard, play harder, snap hardest.


Comments

All comments eligible for publication in Daily Pennsylvanian, Inc. publications.