Adjusting to life at Penn isn’t easy, especially when it comes to joining clubs and other extracurriculars. But don’t worry, everyone finds their place! Don’t believe us? Just take a look at these fellow freshies you’ll be seeing at GBMs and practice:



  • The Overachiever-est Overachiever: She's already on the board of that super exciting club you just joined. And the other one. AND the other one. In fact, she needs to leave the GBM early to get to another meeting. Yeah, it's only the second week of October. We don't know how she made it that far either. We also don’t know how she has THIS much Penn gear. Like holy shit. 
  • The "I heard there was food": He's not actually a part of the club, but he's got his paper plate ready to save another swipe and attack that cold, underwhelming (but free!) pizza. 
  • The résumé builder: "Ohmygod college isn’t just about classes and GPA haven’t you figured this out already?? OCR is sooner than you think!"
  • The gentle giant: He’s fucking ripped and plays three club sports already (again, we don’t know how he does it). Pottruck is his first, second, and third home, but when he’s not pumping iron, he’s at your GBM. He’s got a soft side for that really woke social club you’re in, so of course everyone loves him. Highbrow approves (but we’re still kind of intimidated). 
  • Loves (!) alcohol: Unlike the rest of the nerds here, she’s smart AND really social. You know because you see her in front of some tapestry with a different group of “sisters for life” on your Instagram feed every night. Also, if she hasn’t said it at least 10 times already, she’s ready for BYOs. Like, all the time. It’s actually kind of concerning. 
  • The misplaced Whartonite: Honestly, it’s heartwarming to see him do something that isn’t consulting. Seeing him care about a genuine cause that doesn’t have to do with business is so refreshing; maybe he even has a sou—never mind, he joined the marketing and finance team. Highbrow suggests having the GBM outside of Huntsman.  
  • The experienced high schooler: He did this club all four years of high school, so he knows exactly what he’s doing. Trust him, he’s qualified. There’s a good chance you’ll see his face on a student government campaign flyer soon.
  • The general member: You care, and that’s the most important thing. Getting rejected from the board or that committee doesn’t mean you aren’t good enough, there were just a lot of better qualified applicants this year! Highbrow isn’t bitter, we’re just confused about why doing community service necessitates competition. 

If you don’t fit into any of these categories, rest assured, anxious freshman. You’ve still got plenty of time to become a walking stereotype. Until then, chill out. Seriously. 


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