Highbrow

Senior girl 1: I don’t want to be fat during my senior year.

Senior girl 2: Yeah, that’s too cliche.

Drunk football player: Man, I’m gonna Facebook stalk some bitches and pass the fuck out.

Guy 1: Who's the man? Tell me who's the man?!

Guy 2: Tuesday’s crossword is not that hard.

Guy 1: You couldn’t do it!

Guy 2: I totally could. I could do Sunday by myself.

Guy 1: Bullshit.

British sophomore: “This happens every four years, right?”