Highbrow

Whartonite after class presentation: And that is how you suck a professor's dick.

Drunk dude: I can't remember anything about beer before wine, so I think I'm in the clear!

Girl on cell in Starbucks: Should I get my peppermint mocha with whipped cream or without? I only ate 200 calories today, so I want something delish.

Jewish student: Is Christmas the 24th or the 25th?

Pretentious Whartonite: Penn girls are all gold diggers, but I'm a diamond.

Dude to Street Editor: Am I going to make it into Shoutouts? I slept in the Quad on the first night of NSO!

Chick to friend: He kind of looks like a Ken doll... except that would mean he has no genitalia.

Aspiring Penn fashion designer: I’m so excited for my new collection! It’s going to be very dark, gothic and mack-uh-brey.
Friend: It’s macabre you dumbass.