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This Issue 10/26/2006

Also in this issue

• Whacking Bush
• Fun for the Sleep Deprived
• Bloody 'ell!
• Panic on the Playground
• A House of No One's Own

Let's face it -- you're not distinguished. It's mid-October, you've already resorted to Bursar funds, Paul Ryan still doesn't know your name, your room is furnished by IKEA, 1920 Commons and, perhaps the most embarrassing, posters from the people outside the Bookstore. What's worse, you've got holes in your jeans, underwear and even your shoes. But don't give up on yourself just yet. We haven't. Ego is here to boost your lame-ass yet again, showing you how to take your own trash as well as that of others and turn it into treasure.

First, take those smelly old shoes to Yahya. Yah, that's right, Yahya. Tailor and fabric merchandiser of Distinguished Fabrics, Yahya is behind much of the pimp of Philly elite. Take your worn leather shoes to these miracle workers for a complete makeover. They may remain comfortably worn on the inside, but they'll be unrecognizably distignsuished on the surface.

You can replace the upper part of your shoes with your pick of fabric. Rock the designer labels, try tweed, plaid, snakeskin, use your imagination. And this is Philly, so don't be timid about it.