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This Issue 12/09/2004

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• Get the clap
• Reviews
• As we lick it
• Meet Andrew and his Cocker

This article appeared in the December 9th joke issue.

College junior, Noble's got dark brown hair and dimples, and though he's almost 22, he readily admits that he still gets carded at Mad4Mex every time he goes.

"By now it's a joke, but, I mean, it's kind of crazy. People tell me I look 15, 16 everyday," he explains, giggling, shaking his leg a bit against the side of the bed he's sitting on.

"It's weird." But what's weirder is his relationship with his dog. Even as he sits on his bed, sipping a coke, he won't leave what he affectionately refers to as "the Beast" alone.

"His real name is Cocker, but, I mean, that's not what I call him," Noble says, stroking away.

"It's just like his show name. He's a beaut, isn't he? Wins awards and everything." At one point Norma Leachy, one of Noble's housemates, walks in without knocking. She doesn't seem to find Noble's relationship with "the Beast" odd at all. In fact, she doesn't turn her head, even when Noble starts repeating "C'mon boy, stay at attention," over and over, cursing occasionally.

"I guess it's sort of rare to have one of these living with you at an Ivy League college, but, I mean, it's a pretty lucrative thing for Andy," she says, putting her long brown hair up in a ponytail.

"And, I mean, I think it's pretty cool for everyone in the house. We've all gotten used to it. It's not like he makes us play with Cocker, or anything, unless we want to. Though, I think at this point all of us are involved in their activities in some way or another." So this heavy petting is just part of the pair's daily routine?

"Oh, no," Leachy says, pursing her lips.

"It's just sort of how they prepare before a performance, right Andy?" He doesn't answer her question. Still, she breaks his reverie, and after glancing at his watch, he stands up. Expletives abound.

"I'm fucking late," he says. "Tio's gonna kill me." And with that, he's up and running. Oh, and yeah. There's no canine in sight.

But what's weirder is his relationship with his dog. Even as he sits on his bed, sipping a coke, he won't leave what he affectionately refers to as "the Beast" alone.

"His real name is Cocker, but, I mean, that's not what I call him," Noble says, stroking away. "It's just like his show name. He's a beaut, isn't he? Wins awards and everything."

At one point Norma Leachy, one of Noble's housemates, walks in without knocking. She doesn't seem to find Noble's relationship with "the Beast" odd at all. In fact, she doesn't turn her head, even when Noble starts repeating "C'mon boy, stay at attention," over and over, cursing occasionally.