10 Last Minute Halloween Costumes You Already Have in the House
Between homework, clubs, and the buffet at Commons, Penn kids have a lot on their plates.
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Between homework, clubs, and the buffet at Commons, Penn kids have a lot on their plates.
Frustrated FroGro shopper: Khloe Kardashian just fell for the wrong guy, but love is love man. Love is love.
When our hotline blings, it’s usually Drake in his Moncler jacket asking us to call him on his cell phone. But today, peasants, we decided to share our conversation in the Round Up because we’re #generous.
Street is looking for unique, driven, quirky, and just all around awesome seniors to be Ego of the Week. Sound like someone you know? Nominate them here!
Street: What inspired you to create Annie DeBeers? (Ed. note: Annie DeBeers is Josef's Drag Queen Persona)
Now that’s is getting cold, everyone is hibernating in the library. Highbrow is taking the opportunity to remind everyone how to be considerate. This should all be common courtesy. So do it.
In honor of National Nut Day, Lowbrow researched a bunch of nut–cases from our nation's history. You learned about them in history class, but until now, you never knew this side of them.
Winter’s coming: the air is crisp, there’s a new One Direction album and food’s running scarce. What would happen if you didn’t have nuts left to eat (or play with)? We don’t want to find out. Lowbrow has constructed a guide to storing your nuts, keeping them safe and making sure they don’t go rancid!
“How was your break? Let’s get lunch this week.” Highbrow has a packed schedule with empty lunch plans. Welcome back to pointless small talk and campus, everyone.
Girl on Locust: I hate girls that be like I'm Persian... Bitch, you from Iran.
Street: What is the most interesting event you've attended with the Philomathean Society?
It’s a common misconception that Amy Gutmann is the reigning authority figure at Penn. But according to Highbrow (and who do you trust more than us), the true monarchs within our community cannot be found in the admissions office or in any administrative position for that matter. That dude who you noticed carrying a camera around the party last weekend? Yeah, he’s the one who really runs your life.
Donald Trump is leading the Republican polls, and it appears he may actually become President. In a super legitimate interview this past week, he announced that all he does is win. "To me, it's all about winning. I'm going to win. DJ Khaled's 'All I Do Is Win'? Literally my lifestyle," Trump said.
Obviously, the baby murdering torture mill that is known as Planned Parenthood is just in it for the moola. They want the ca$h and they'll do anything for it. What's next for the infant harvesters? Lowbrow investigates what Planned Parenthood's could sell next to fund their evil clinics.
Pumpkin spice Highbrow! Just kidding, our doctor told us that we’re allergic to that tragic seasonal flavor. Fall is here—let the gourd times roll.
Girl in choker at the Writer's House: The overarching structure of fiction is phallic. It rises and levels.
Best Cheap BYO: Dim Sum Garden Go with a group of friends and sample a bit of everything. Order double of the soup dumplings and scallion pancakes... just to be safe. You’ll still be shocked when the bill comes at how little you end up paying.
The pope came to visit and this is obviously exactly how it went.
Vegas: #seniors #yolo #strippers
Girl washing celery, carrots, and cucumbers in Fisher Bennett basement women’s bathroom: I'm making salad.
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