Step 1:
Redo your bathroom tiles—the place you pee is not complete until it's got Grecian floor tiles.
Step 2:
Hire your own security. Yeah there is a front desk, but there's no one guarding your actual door. It’s kind of like your own personal bouncer for the nonstop party which is Domus.
Step 3:
The pool closes right when school starts, but if you kick out your roommate and install your own indoor pool in his room then you can wear your man speedo all year long. Also the public pool is undoubtably for peasants.
Step 4:
Get rid of the kitchen. It’s not like you're ever gonna cook anything. That seems like the personal chef’s job or maybe just order your food online because it is 2014.
Step 5:
Get a second Domus apartment to store clothes and golf clubs in, so the apartment you actually live in doesn’t look cluttered.
Step 6:
Google “famous art.” Now that you know everything about good art, start your personal collection. Think: in 40 years you can donate your apartment, just like the Barnes. But they won’t need to move your collection downtown, because let’s be real, Domus is nicer than Center City.
