510–644–6366
510–644–6366: Hey, you back home tho?
You: I am sorry, new phone, who is this?
510–644–6366: Michael! You kno from sophomore year math
You: Michael, wow it's been like three years....
510–644–6366: Yeah I was just thinkin of u and how much fun we used to have in Mr. Jeromes
You: hhaha great times lol
510–644–6366: I saw ur facebook status saying you was coming home
You: oh yeah
510–644–6366: I was hoping to catch up
510–644–6366: *Oh I meant suc my dick
925–428–3968
925–428–3968: Hey babe
You: Anthony?
925–428–3968: Yeah I saw your fb status, welcome back
You: Lol thanks
925–428–3968: Yeah thought up I would hit up the old prom date lol
You: haha how are you? It's been super long
925–428–3968: you know what else is super long
You: fuck off Anthony
Bobby
Bobby: Hey hows college treating you!?
You: Hey Bobby, really good. How's the ultimate frisbee team, going to nationals this year?
Bobby: the team hasn't been the same since we lost our number one cheer leader
You: Bobby, I am gonna stop you right there, If this is a booty text, the answer is no. If you saw my facebook status and hoped to rekindle some perceived old flame or whatever, it is a no. I am here to see the parents not to have sex in some one's gross ass basement.
Bobby: oh I was just gonna say, that I am working at the Olive Garden now and wanted your mom to know that she can get free bread sticks if you guys want to come in
You: oh bobby, I am sorry. lol, I just got some weird texts, you wouldn't believe some guys. I would love some breadsticks
Bobby: I would love to get some of my hot bread all up in you
You: Jesus, I am so done with home
