It's almost Valentine's Day, people, so listen up if you want to be sexcessful. Sex songs are a genre of their own. The song can’t be too fast, as couples can quickly find themselves moving to the beat, and we are not going for synchronized sports here. On the other hand, it can’t be too slow, as that puts a damper on the mood. It shouldn't make you reminisce, it shouldn't make you cringe and it most definitely shouldn't prompt you to sing along (unfortunately, I speak from experience). 

Welcome to Bangtown: population YOU.

Hold up, wait a minute, you might find yourself asking. I don’t play music when I have sex. That’s sooooo weird. Well, you’re doing it wrong. Do you ever clean your room without music? No. Same deal here, except...a lot messier. These songs are sexy as hell and will hopefully give you some of their sexy if they're nice.

ALSO, quick note, please AVOID:

Pony: Ginuwine. Lyrics include “If you're horny, let’s do it, ride it, my pony.” Steer clear.

Remix (ignition): R Kelly. It’s weird to have sex to a song written by a guy who probably has sex with minors. He's also straight-up bizarre.


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