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Arts & Entertainment

Hilary swank looks like a man...

Million Dollar Baby is the conventional movie that everyone's sure to like a lot, but not to love.

by ROB COHEN

Editor's Picks

Kevin Lo Rogue Wave Out of the Shadow On the wacky and feel-good "Kicking the Heart Out," Zach Rogue sings, "If music is my lover, you are just a tease." Judging from most of the lyrics on the Bay Area band's debut, Rogue has a witty and biting sense of humor.

by 34TH STREET

Assault on our intelligence

Jean-Francois Richet's remake of John Carpenter's 1976 film Assault on Precinct 13 could almost be billed as a parody of the typical action flick.

by ALIX MCKENNA

Apple Reveals iPod shuffle

Posters reading "Life is random" lined the walls of last Wednesday's Macworld expo as Steve Jobs and Apple unveiled their newest product in the ubiquitous iPod genealogy.

by KEVIN LO

Basketball a la Carter

In 1999 Ken Carter, head coach of an inner city high school basketball team in California, created a large controversy when he locked out his undefeated team because they were doing poorly in school.

by ALEXANDRA CHALAT

Warm-up songs

Cold weather got you down? Throw these warm-weather themed songs on your iPod and make snow angels in the Quad.

by 34TH STREET

Sex and rock and roll

This article appeared in the December 9th joke issue. Bedroom dresser. Second drawer. Right behind my hot panties is one of my most treasured possessions.

by ALOTTA PHUCKIN

Hot sticky sugar sweet

This article appeared in the December 9th joke issue. While interning at Vivid Video, I happened upon a script featuring one of my good friends in a, ahem, special movie.

by 34TH STREET

Reviews

This article appeared in the December 9th joke issue. Various Penn Students Hookup Confessions: Volume Ever think one of your hookup experiences was truly unique?

by 34TH STREET

Singing to a different poon

This article appeared in the December 9th joke issue. Misty Beethoven: The Musical is destined for Oscar glory.

by SWEATEE MUFFMUNCHER

Editor's Picks

In the Aeroplane over the Sea Since this is my last editor's pick of the semester (tear?), I'm going all out.

by NEUTRAL MILK HOTEL

Alexander the gay

Oliver Stone's bloated new epic Alexander is really, really gay. Overt male homoeroticism pervades almost every other scene.

by JEFF LEVIN

Worse Than watching paint dry

Because we know more about film than all of Hollywood (and by the transitive property, that means all of you too), we thought we'd present to you, our glorious readers, the grandest film gaffes of the year 2004.

by ZACH SMITH

Stop in the name of law!

Closer features one of the most beautiful casts ever assembled. Alice (Natalie Portman) and Dan (Jude Law) face an obstacle in their relationship when Anna (Julia Roberts) is hired to take Dan's picture for a book cover jacket and a passionate kiss between the two ensues.

by HILLARY KELLY

Best of '04

Kanye West -- College Dropout The man behind some of Jay-Z's best work makes his debut, without a college degree to boot. Brian Wilson -- SMiLE 37 years after its inception, Brian Wilson re-records his "teenage symphony to God," who was pleased, but wanted more cowbell.

by 34TH STREET

Jerry Bruckheimer is a Garish Assclown

Within the first 10 minutes of National Treasure, a gunpowder-packed treasure ship, submerged under the icy tundra, explodes.

by CARLY DAUCHER

Go Hasselhoff, Go

The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie tries to be broad enough to appeal to a wide variety of audiences, but ultimately fails to please any.

by MATT KURUC

Editor's picks

Jim Newell Puff Daddy and the Family No Way Out Buying '97s No Way Out marked an important step in my record collection's evolution.

by 34TH STREET

Battle of the online rentals

In the age of campusfood, eBay and amazon.com, leaving the house has become a thing of the past. Now we can sit at home on the couch, wallowing in our own lethargy as the world's bounty is delivered right to our door.

by CLAYTON NEUMAN

Behind the Mask

Picture this: MC So-and-so doing 90 in a sky-blue, drop-top BMW, coasting along the Van Wyck, as the leaves falling from the trees coat the concrete with the carnival colors of autumn.

by JOHN COYNE

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