Theos boy: I’m kind of trendy right now.
PiKapp Pledge: Isn't this girl hot? Doesn't she look like JJ Abrams?
WASP: I took a pregnancy test in a McDonald's bathroom in Paris when I was 16.
Poli Sci Professor: You guys go to formals? Do you get to wear sequins?
Radian boy: If I have to eat another Sweetgreen salad, I will literally die.
