Famed hand-kisser, nude model and Viagra tester gives Street a peek inside his portfolio
Street: So David, you're a pretty popular guy around campus. What gives you the aura that you have?
DB: I would say I'm notorious rather than popular. I just like going out and meeting folks.
Street: And how do you usually go about meeting folks?
DB: If I'm sitting next to someone in class, I'll introduce myself. If I'm in an elevator with someone, I'll introduce myself - situations when people are normally quiet.
Street: Do you have any unique methods of introducing yourself to people?
DB: Well, I guess I'm known as the hand-kisser.
Street: What does that mean?
DB: Every once in a while, if I meet a particularly lovely lady, I kiss her hand.
Street: And when did you start this practice?
DB: I'll be honest, when Jacques Chirac came to visit the United States, he kissed Laura Bush's hand, and I was so impressed by the chutzpah that took that I started doing it myself.
Street: Fantastic. What was your best hand-kissing experience?
DB: Oh, there's no question - it's when I kissed Amy Gutmann's hand at her house for the Halloween party last year.
Street: What did she have to say about that?
DB: She was very diplomatic and presidential and dignified.
Street: Do you think she washed her hand after that?
DB: Well, she probably shook hands with 5,000 people that night. She probably washed her hand that night - except for the hand that I kissed, which she probably hasn't washed since.
Street: You've had some crazy jobs in your time. Can you describe some of your craziest jobs?
DB: I've been a nude model for the Fine Arts department, I was a subject in a clinical trial at HUP measuring the safety of Viagra and Levitra, and I recently filed for a patent. I'm sure you've noticed the trend where girls wear tight clothing with writing written across the chest or the butt that gives tacit approval to check them out. My idea, which I own, according to the patent department of the United States government, is clothing with the writing in braille.
Street: How did you find out about being a nude model?
DB: I went down to the Addams Gallery and I asked to be a model. After they asked what frat I was pledging, I explained that I was serious. They put my e-mail on the list for instructors to contact me.
Street: Has being a model helped you with the ladies?
DB: Of course - word gets around.
Street: Are the pictures still hanging at the Addams Gallery?
DB: No, but they were there last year.
Street: Are you worried this could hurt your political career later in life?
DB: No - it's about the art. Do you know what the difference is between art and pornography?
Street: Nope.
DB: A government grant.
