Sick of Smokes? J-Date letting you down? The new pick-up place near campus happens to double as a beacon of self-defense. Confused?

For some old-world glamour and traditional garb, head to 35th and Lancaster for an unconventional work out, with a chivalrous twist. The Fencing Academy of Philadelphia (FAP) offers both adult and children’s classes for students ranging from eight to 85. With clumsy beginners sharing the arena with more advanced students, the FAP arena is a cross section of varying abilities.

The Academy has only been around for 13 years but in its time has seen two fencers who managed to conquer the World Championships in 2006. Don’t let the learning curve intimidate you — Maestro Masters emphasizes the casual nature of picking up the sport. “Fencing,” he said, “is an individual sport and one that stays with you forever. Probably because it takes you that long to learn it.”

Masters invited us to participate in a standard one-hour adult introductory class. Our beginner lesson included instruction in fancy footwork techniques — ranging from sidestepping to backwards skipping — zen-instilling glove dropping exercises (made to stimulate hand-eye coordination) and Spartacus, a game that challenged our wit and instinct, and was in fact the only portion of the class where we came into contact with weaponry of any sort. While it did not include any one-on-one sparring, the class did include lessons in mask etiquette, standard positioning of the feet and reflex-sharpening exercises.

If that isn’t incentive enough, Masters told us that at least 10 couples that had met in one of his classes proceeded to get married. Your Yenta never had it this good.