Steve Markowitz (W’10) didn’t exactly fly under the radar during his years at Penn. The AEPi brother played Spring Fling and snagged a job at Google, all while cultivating an alter ego: Hoodie Allen.

Wikipedia lists several genres for his music, including “hipster hop” (whatever the fuck that is). While he might not be as buzzed about on campus as Kayvon , he's still one of the famous Penn alums we aren’t ashamed to claim. And those numbers are dwindling. 

So Highbrow decided to institute a new tradition: the throwback. There are so many Penn minutiae that many underclassmen simply don't remember: American Apparel, landlines in high–rises, even a Walnut pre–Starbucks. It's important for us to share our cultural history—starting with Hoodie Allen. 


He (Hoodie?) began making music before his graduation and continued through his job at Google, eventually deciding to pursue it full–time. He may be one of the only Penn grads in history to actualize the “I’m going into finance/banking/tech for a few years before I pursue (insert dream here).” It’s objectively impressive.

A few mix–tapes and two studio albums later, few of his fans even know he went to Penn. And that’s fair—in a 2008 interview with Street, he pretty much predicted that. 

Street: How do you think your Penn degree will help you in the rap world? 
SM: Um. Zero percent, not at all. 

Touché.

But Hoodie Allen did go to Penn, and we’ve got the receipts. Other than the Wikipedia page and the SPIKE alumni network, of course. The real proof that he not only went to Penn but went to Penn comes in song form. 

True devotees may remember his song “UPenn Girls,” only currently accessible via a shady third–party Soundcloud link. It’s a veritable microcosm of late–2000s Penn culture. Highbrow’s pretty sure it will serve as a sociological artifact years down the line.

The song begins with “live from Chancellor Street…” And the dated but still–funny Penn references begin.

This modern classic features rhymes only a drunk Penn student could think up. He hits the OCR checkbox with “I don’t know if y’all can understand me, so I told ‘em I was recruiting for Morgan Stanley.” He also dates himself with a reference to AChiO. In case you were wondering, they’re “mad fly hoes.” Dr. Seuss would be proud. 

The song goes like a litany of sorority names and references to Greek Lady. Hoodie really doubles down on the "work hard, play hard" ethos with quite a few complaints about writing papers hungover. The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Highbrow’s chief complaint is the use of “UPenn.” Do you really need to identify yourself as an Ivy Leaguer that badly? Oh, wait, you’re an “Ivy League boy with state school flavor.” Point taken. 


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