Theft: On Jan. 24, an employee at Fresh Grocer discovered a vagrant shoplifting. The man was reported as stealing a half wheel of brie with corresponding raspberry chipotle sauce and olive tapenade. When confronted, the vagrant became irritable and attempted to assault the manager with a baguette and Genoa summer sausage later traced to the Metropolitan Bakery.
Arrest: On Jan. 12, police questioned three females, aged 19-21, on the corner of 38th and Spruce for possible prostitution violations. Though police determined that the women were merely en route to the Copabanana nightclub, evidence put officers hot on the trail of stolen dignity.
Theft: On Jan. 16, An 18-year old male reportedly had his novelty identification card stolen while attempting to enter Smoky Joe's Tavern. Police could not confirm the theft, and the victim was later granted access to Marbar using his PennCard.
