To maximize our chicken tasting experience, we tried the top four chicken flavors offered between the two.
Federal Donuts
1. Sweet Soy Garlic
This flavor can be best compared to a dumpling in chicken form. You may be skeptical now, but this fried, warm, moist goodness was the perfect combination of Asian and Southern comfort food. The soy was more of an after taste, but the chicken itself took the prize home.
2. Honey–Glazed Donut
This freebie with any chicken purchase is the ultimate palate cleanser. Take a bite between each flavor of chicken. Or just get four and have a whole one in between, your choice.
Final Verdict Haiku
Fried Chicken and 'nuts
You bring peace to Middle East
Best duo idea
Wishbone
1. Mac and Cheese
We're afraid to even start describing this because we might not stop. It looks like dog throw up in the container but taste like a big chunk of heaven. It's hard to fuck up a dish with macaroni, mascarpone, cheddar, swiss, summer tomatoes, chipotle, chicken sausage, herbs and pretzel crumbs. Being the fat 
asses that we are, we were all too close to buying a soft pretzel to dunk in the mac. Fair warning, half a pound seemed significantly less here than it did at Federal. And we may or may not have gotten into an argument with the cashier about the amount of food.
2. Pretzel Crusted White Meat Chicken
This was a true chicken tender, but definitely not a "chili garlic" level of fried chicken. If you need a late night snack and the McDonald's line is out the door at 12 a.m., this is the way to go. Federal closes at 7 p.m. (it's only flaw). Keep this in the consideration set for good drunk eats...aka coming here sober will leave a brother a little sad.
3. Pretzel Crusted Dark Meat Chicken
We couldn't taste the difference between the white and dark meat. We also couldn't locate the meat because there was so much crust. Crust is never a bad thing, don't get us wrong, but a good fried chicken is lost without a good ratio.
4. Buttermilk Biscuit
Un–freakin–real. A little bite of happiness post lack–luster chicken. Best compared to a fluffy cloud of hot and buttery goodness. You can come here for just the biscuit and mac and cheese and leave a happy camper.
5. Dippers
We chose parmesan pesto, lime chipotle mayo and tamarind sweet chili in an attempt to expand beyond the usual honey mustard. Mistake. Never expand beyond the honey mustard. Our tip: stick with the classics to avoid high risk situations. High risk being parmesan pesto in this case. Sounds good in theory, but in practice, this will let you down. Life lessons, kids.
Final Verdict Haiku
We had such high hopes
We want our half hour back
And new underwear [Ed. note: not in a good way]
In Conclusion
Federal is often overlooked as simply a good donut shop for finals week, but in reality it should be on your list of places to go for a fabulous meal. Both the donuts and the chicken are perfectly fried and won't make you feel like you just took a bath in a tub of grease. Wishbone, on the other hand, requires a deep cleanse with multiple face washes afterwards. The glazes and seasonings at Federal Donuts put Wishbone's to shame. Our recommendation: pick up sides from Wishbone, and get your fried chicken and donuts from Federal. If you're in the mood for a good mac and cheese and biscuit, Wishbone is Mecca. But we don't plan on going there sober again anytime soon (read: ever).
