(Philadelphia, PA)—

In a shocking turn of events, West Philadelphia resident and Penn student Melissa Bartoli (W’ 17), who has been to the gym twice already this semester in the hopes of working on her glute definition, announced that she had only been harassed twice during the entirety of her time at the gym this year.

“It’s been a real shock for me,” she said.

Bartoli reported that both of her trips to the gym included only brief instances of harassment from men who watched her weirdly for 15 minutes before approaching her and propositioning her for a date.

“I couldn’t believe that I had made it through two whole days without more than two men coming up to me and telling me that I look really cute in my workout top and if I came there often," she said. 

Macy Greenfeld (W & E ‘19), a witness to both of Bartoli’s ventures to the gym, said, “I was completely flabbergasted. She made it through two separate days at the gym, and only two men acted on their creepy feelings and bothered her!”

“And only one of those two guys called her a bitch when she said no—it was really a testament to how far we’ve come in feminism in this country,” she added.

Bartoli says she doesn’t know if this week’s events will last for the remainder of her gym time this semester, but she remains hopeful.

“Soon, I might be able to go on a run without more than, say, five different men giving me once–overs. What a world!”

Photo courtesy of Creative Commons.