Amy Gutmann and several other high–ranking Penn officials, including Provost Vincent Price, were spotted earlier today at the grand re–opening of Sweetgreen. Gutmann and her colleagues made impromptu speeches to the crowd gathered to celebrate the popular salad chain’s recent renovation.

Gutmann praised the virtues of Sweetgreen, calling it “a Penn institution,” and “quite literally one of the most important cultural establishments to have graced our campus.”

“We have a responsibility as a community to cherish and uphold the foundations of our culture and our school, and that’s what Sweetgreen does for us,” she continued.  “For every salad that an over–privileged student intakes, we get another donor banging on our door trying to buy in their under–qualified child’s acceptance. So we thank you, salad lovers of Penn!”

Provost Price also gave a speech, during which he sang Sweetgreen’s praises and called it “the best part of his day.” He asked, “Where else could I get a Rad Thai on such short notice? It’s the perfect dinner option for someone like me, who enjoys a good dinner but who wants to keep an eye on their waistband.”

He added, “But if you are looking for a fun splurge, here is a pro-tip: you can ask for two pieces of bread—it’s free!”

Provost Price continued to applaud Sweetgreen for its health contributions to the West Philadelphia area. “Without you, Penn students might quite literally not make it to Puerta Vallarta. Gracias, Sweetgreen.”

Photo credit: Creative Commons


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