Listings: Concerts

Vida Blue The Electric Factory 421 North 7th Street Fri, April 11, 8:30 p.m. $22 adv/$24 dos The first thing I thought about when I heard about this funk band was Rickie Martin's "Livin' La Vida Loca." Remember that? Think back to those high school dances when y'all were aspiring college frat/sorority boys/girls. The guys in ultra-baggy outfits and over-gelled spiky hair, the girls with shiny frosted pink lipstick and supertight tops screaming to show off recent thoracic developments... ah, those were the days. Fischerspooner Theatre of the Living Arts 334 South Street Fri, April 11, 9 p.m. $18.50 adv/$19.50 dos www.ticketmaster.com A few friends of mine decided to start a garage band with a twist. One was a classically trained pianist, one was a ballet dancer who also played the violin, and one was a gymnast with a passion for Marilyn Manson. The name of their band should have been "Awful." My hopes for Fischer (the classically trained musician) Spooner (the video artist/performer) are much higher though. The indie electro-dance group's made it big in NYC, and I think Philly should give them a warm welcome. The Musical Box The Electric Factory 421 North 7th Street Sat, April 12, 8:30 p.m. $25 adv/$28 dos When I was just a little lass, I asked my mother for a musical box. She gave me one with a ballet dancer inside that danced around "just like you do." Yeah, back then I was a ballerina. Promising for a four year old. Then I became a six year-old burnout. I took ice skating, which was not quite as positive an experience. I mean, I was really fast, but my grace was gone. I would have excelled at ice-hockey, but I was too girly for ice hockey back then. So, I fell apart, and started taking piano lessons. Basically, I sucked. I was a terrible, terrible pianist. "She has good rhythm, she should play drums," my piano teacher told me. My piano teacher was a freak of nature, who gained and lost 50 pounds every few months. Luckily, I escaped from my childhood talentless and horrifically scathed, just as my parents wanted. Dirty Three Theatre of the Living Arts 334 South Street Sat, April 12, 9 p.m. $14 adv/$16 dos www.ticketmaster.com I thought the term 'Dirty Three' was only used by members of my family to describe that unfortunate incident with my brother, his girlfriend, and my Uncle Jay in the hot tub after they all had a little too much boxed wine last New Year's Eve. In fact, it's also the name of an instrumental trio, coming all the way from Melbourne, Australia to grace the stage at TLA with that special kind of gypsy-fiddle-granola music especially popular with aging hippies and artsy types. I'll go to this show if it'll help stop the nightmares -- I'd rather watch this threesome play together any day. Stanley Clarke Theatre of the Living Arts 334 South Street Sun, April 13, 8 p.m. $29.50 www.ticketmaster.com On Stanley Clarke's website, he is billed as "Bassist, Composer, Conductor,Orchestrator, Arranger, Songwriter, Record Producer, and Recording Artist." To have a finger in all these pies, he either doesn't sleep or takes a fun assortment of amphetamines. I can only bill myself as 'Student' and 'Drain on My Parents' Resources' and even that's a stretch -- DeVry doesn't really count as school. Anyway, this show is definitely worth your $29.50; Clarke is known as the greatest living bassist, and you can add 'Jazz Connoisseur' to your list of achievements, right under 'Binge Drinker'.