Aaron McGruder: The Boondocks
Free Library of Philadelphia
1901 Vine Street
Thu, 8 p.m., $6
215-686-5322
Who doesn't love the Sunday comics? Come meet the creator of Huey Freeman, the scornful protagonist of The Boondocks, at the Free Library of Philadelphia. Find out what goes on behind the scenes of the funny pages and how to turn those doodles you draw in class into a full time occupation.
Exhibiting Your Artwork (Do's and Don'ts of Presentation)
Center for Emerging Visual Artists
237 S. 18th St.
Thu, 2:30 p.m., $5
(215) 546-7775
www.cfeva.org
Do: Show up 40 minutes late to your own opening with deconstructed crinoline dress, lots of blue eye shadow, dark red lipstick and hair either teased or slicked back with side part. Don't: try to explain too much. People will derive much deeper meaning than actually exists from your work if you leave it open for interpretation. Drag you avant garde booty over to the Center for Emerging Visual Artists for more beads of presentation wisdom.
Art and Community VII: The Americas
University City Science Center
3701 Market Street
Mon-Sat, 9:00 a.m. - 5 p.m., free
http://www.kleinartgallery.org
Put that art history class to some use by checking out the multimedia creations of 12 female artists from all over the Americas. As you tour the gallery and explore the world of art production in the western hemisphere, taste some wines courtesy of West Park Imports.
Stuart Davis and American Abstraction: A Masterpiece in Focus
Philadelphia Museum of Art
Benjamin Franklin Parkway and 26th St.
Tue-Sun, 10 a.m. - 5 p.m., Fri 10 a.m. - 8:45 p.m., $7
www.philamuseum.org/main.asp
(215) 763-8100
This exhibit highlights the great Davis mural, Swing Landscape. It's a great example of abstract art on a gigantic scale. I'm pretty sure it won't be as cool as the one on the highway of the zoo. That one is awesome. Whoever painted the tiger is a genius. GENIUS!
Gladys Kravitz's Karaoke Night
Woody's
13th and Walnut streets
Mon, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m., $2
(215) 545-1893
www.woodsbar.com
Last week may have been an unpleasant reminder that you forgot to try out for American Idol, but don't beat yourself up about it. You're in Philadelphia, a town that provides many opportunities to publicly declare your status as an idiot. So while you anxiously await next year's Wing Bowl, head on down to Woody's and sing your sorrows away. But remember, an important part of success is knowing your audience. Eminem may not be a good idea. Ever.
Lock and Key Party: Valentine Special
Club 27
27 Bank Street
Fri, 7 p.m.-9 p.m., $20-$30
(215) 922-3020
Lock and key parties... Club 27 is offering a little early Valentine's Day party. It's probably a great chance to have fun with your valentine or to find one of those one night only valentines that you never have to see again. And hey, if you strike out you can always get drunk off your ass with dirty well drinks during the open bar afterwards.
Lifted Sundays
Shampoo
Sun, 9 p.m., $7-$15
417 N. 8th St.
(215) 922-7500
Looking for an alternative clubbing experience? Or maybe you just really like getting wildly drunk and out of control on Sunday nights. What better way to get ready for that Monday morning class than to empty your wallet on $2.50 U-call-it drinks? DJs Jimmy Mac & Moon want you to come; you want to go. Just do it.
Power 99 FM Saturdays
Chrome
939 N. Delaware Avenue
Sun, 9 p.m.-2 p.m., $15-$20
(215) 931-0101
If you are going to claim a day, claim it. What was formerly known as Power 99 FM Saturdays is now, infuriatingly, happening on Sunday. I may be looking at it wrong, but these party nights at clubs fueled by Power 99 FM DJ's are overstretching their bounds. If you are still reading, though, you are probably interested in this party atmosphere. You may also already know about Chrome nightclub, which is the only redeeming quality about this event. Go and enjoy this mockery.
NBA Players Party
Suede Lounge
120 Market Street
Wed, 10:30 p.m., $10-$20
(215) 923-5570
Wednesday nights at the Suede lounge are calling those Penn students dying to be V.I.P. It may sound too good to be true, but there is no harm in believing your leather pants and $20 at the door will get you face to face with Sixers Players (I capitalize to emphasize the double meaning). Get there early and don't forget the Aqua Velva. Also, watch A Night at the Roxbury before you leave.
Savior Fare
The Five Spot
5 S. Bank Street
Wed, 9 p.m., $5-$10
(215) 574-0070
For those of you who have experienced the one-dimensional bars downtown, this is the end of innocence. The Five Spot has two independent floors presenting Savior Fare (DJ group featuring DJ Mike Nyce) downstairs, and a live band showcase upstairs. The doors open to this awakening at 10 p.m. Cover downstairs is $5 and upstairs $7. The Savior Fare will spin an assortment of Hip-hop, Soul, R&B, Reggae, and most stuff in between.
Breaking the Ice: an Israeli-Palestinian Antarctic
Expedition
Sheraton University City Hotel
36th and Chestnut streets
Thu, 8 p.m., free
(215) 546-5556 ext. 511
Sometimes, Israelis and Palestinians kill each other. The solution? Send 'em to the coldest place on earth, chain them together on a windy cliff and don't let them come home until they've made it to the top of an unclimbed mountain. This forces them to work together to overcome extreme challenges, like frostbitten toes and unattractively chapped lips. Take notes, Abbas, take notes.
Reading from the Front Row Theatre Company
Kelly Writer's House
3805 Locust Walk
Sun, 6:30 p.m., free
(215) 573-9748
http://www.writing.upenn.edu/~wh/index.html
This Sunday, you'll probably be going through withdrawal from last Sunday, when you spent the entire day heckling players. Well now's your chance to do that again, only this time "heckling" is "constructive criticism" and the person you're directing it at is probably hell of a lot smarter than you, because they wrote an award-winning play and you just sit on your ass watching football all day.
Gretchen Worden Memorial Blood Drive
The College of Physicians of Philadelphia
19 S. 22nd St.
Mon, 12 p.m. - 5:45 p.m.
(215) 563-3737 ext. 273
I tried giving blood before. Doctor said my veins were too small and maybe I'd be suitable to donate in a few years, once they grew. I took this metaphorical message to heart and have spent my days "growing" by improving homeless lives cigarette by cigarette, whiskey bottle by whiskey bottle. Like my heart, I think my veins may be big enough now. So join me, don't be a selfish bastard, give up a couple pints for Gretchen.
Wild at Heart
The Rotunda
4014 Walnut Street
Thu, 8 p.m., free
(215) 573-3234
Every second Thursday of the month you can catch some wacky old romantic movies at the Rotunda. This week's pick is Wild at Heart, the rambunctious love story of Sailor and Lula, not to be confused with Girls Gone Wild, the rambunctious love story of guys and boobs, which I am certain will also be having a screening somewhere around campus.
Wondrous Oblivion
The Gershman Y
Broad and Pine streets
Sat, 8 p.m., Sun, 2 p.m., $10-$12
(215) 446-3033
This film is playing downtown as part of the Jewish Film Festival. "OMG, did she say Jewish!?!?" Yes, indeed I did! Enough said. See you there.
White Badge
Stitler B21
208 S. 37th St.
Tue, 7 p.m., free
http://ccat.sas.upenn.edu/ceas/events.html
Think you've seen every movie about Vietnam? Still pissed they made you read The Quiet American for that lame summer reading project? Wondering what more can they offer to appease your dying soul? The Center for East Asian Studies kicks things up with White Badge, part of the ongoing Korean Film Series, which tells the story of Korea's role in the Vietnam War. Keep in mind, at one point, this was the most expensive movie ever made. Wow.
Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons
Kirby Center
71 Public Square
Fri, 8 p.m., $33.50-$43.50
(570) 826-1100
www.kirbycenter.org
Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons was the second concert I ever went to. I was about eight, and after the amazing experience I had at the Michael Bolton concert the previous summer, Frankie had big shoes to fill. Let me tell you -- it was the best night of my life. I ended up partying until 10:30, way past my bedtime. Wow...I was so cool back then!
Polyphonic Spree
Theater of Living Arts
334 South Street
Mon, 8 p.m., $23
(215) 922-1011
Gospel choir for the young and wasted: Polyphonic Spree is the optimistic creation of Tripping Daisy's Tim DeLaughter, who decided that neither Tripping nor Daisy nor his own ridiculous last name was good enough his new band. But apparently everyone who is willing to wear a large white sheet is good enough to join, because they've got like 20 members, and they're all really happy. If Up With People had a Toga Party, it might look like this.
Milton & the Devils Party with Huzzavox / Crave / Soul Plane / Ruse of Fools
The North Star Bar
2639 Poplar Street
Sat, 8 p.m., $7
215-684-0808
www.northstarbar.com
If it's Saturday night and every ounce of your antisocial soul is craving Rosengarten, try Milton & the Devils Party. It's really just an English lecture with slightly more guitar and pyrotechnics, because it's the creation of two former professors. If you thought Shatte and his leather jacket were hot, just wait until you lay eyes and ears on this band and their Paradise Lost-inspired pop. Apparently, they tried to book Meyerson B11 but had to settle for The North Star Bar. Still beats DRL.
Bowling for Soup
Trocadero
1003 Arch Street
Sat, 7 p.m., $13
(215) 922-LIVE
In case you're not on top of your punk bands, this ingeniously named group sings the oh-so-popular teen love ballad "1985." Truthfully, their music is a little cheesy, and a real punk rock band would probably beat the shit out of them, but it'll be a great place to pick up high school girls. Don't act like you didn't already think of that.
Joe Cocker
Kirby Center
71 Public Square
Sun, 7:30 p.m., $39.50-$49.50
(570) 826-1100
www.kirbycenter.org
Joe Cocker. Other than the ridiculous name that I can seriously think about making fun of, this man has been thrilling fans for 50 years. When's the last time you thrilled fans for 50 years? It's tiring work. And you probably don't think you know who he is but you'd be wrong. Remember "You are so beautiful" that you so shamefully sang to your high school girlfriend? Oh yeah, that's the Cock-man workin' his magic.
Gym Class Heroes and Val Emmich
Trocadero
10th and Arch streets
Wed, 6 p.m., $8
(215) 922-LIVE
Ah, gym class. Remind of you of smelly socks and equally gross shorts? Well, this group has turned that idea into gold. This is a hip hop band that features live instruments and a unique sound and might possibly make you nostalgic for the she-man teachers of yesteryear. So, if you think I'm crazy but are still interested (as I know you are), go and see the show. I promise, you won't have to do sit ups.
The Good Doctor
Mandell Theater
3141 Chestnut Street
Thu, 7 p.m., Fri-Sat, 8 p.m., Sun, 3 p.m., $10
(215) 895-6400
This is not a Neil Simon play. But it is a group of his vaudevillian comic sketches that are sure to have you either slapping your knee or slapping the doofus with the running commentary who brought you. So preempt the latter by grabbing your closest metrosexual/Russian friend, doing some cheap vodka shots to warm you during these chilly times, and enjoying the silliness of Chekhov's biggest fan. Don't forget your fur hat.
Aida
Opera Company of Philadelphia
1420 Locust Street
Fri, 8 p.m., $5-$155
(215) 893-3600
http://www.operaphilly.com/
Every time we're together, my best gay friend Michael and I get into a fight about which version of Aida is better, the opera or the play. I think that Adam Pascal is hot enough to sway anyone's opinion to Broadway, but if you actually want an artsy experience, Mike says to hit up the opera. I can never understand what they're talking about, but maybe that's just me.
Donavon Frankenreiter
Theatre of Living Arts
334 South Street
Fri, 9 p.m., $14
(215) 922-1011
This 30-something artist may look like a leftover hippie, but don't let that ridiculous mustache fool you. He used to live in a hut, surfing for Billabong, and playing guitar all day in Hawaii. That is the life! That's so chill you can almost forgive the mustache. Almost.
The Colonial Theatre
227 Bridge Street
Sun, 2 p.m., $6
(610) 917-1228
www.thecolonialtheatre.com
How could anyone resist a movie staring Gene Kelly? Plus, the theme song is just so damn catchy! Check it out, and I promise the next time you're trudging down Locust in a downpour you'll be unable to keep from singing and dancing. Don't worry, you already look ridiculous in those boots. Just go with it.
Little Mermaid
Kimmel Center
260 S. Broad Street
Sat, 10:30 a.m., $10
(215) 790-5800
There are two types of people who are reading this and considering going to see the American Theater Arts for Youth production of the Little Mermaid. The first are folks who legitimately enjoy the wonders that Disney brought to the world. The second group of people thinks Harold and Kumar are heroes for a new generation. If you fit either description, then the Kimmel Center and Ariel are calling to you.
Valentine's Day Cabaret Dinner
Maggiano's Little Italy
1201 Filbert Street
Mon, 7 p.m., $150 per couple
(215) 985-2106
www.maggianos.com
Celebrate Valentine's Day with your special someone or in a group of fourteen old-school swanky style. Stuff yourself with linguini, wash it down with some red wine, and settle in for Maggiano's Cabaret dinner. If you're feeling romantic, go ahead and eat your spaghetti Lady and the Tramp style. If you're on a really awkward date, at least the dazzling display of talents will distract from the pain.
