vote or die. seriously.
2000 Elections
Your Local Polls
Anywhere, USA
Tuesday, November 7, all day, FREE!
Now that the Clintons are out of the Oval Office for good, Americans can put the era of scandals behind them and select a Commander-in-Chief we can trust. Our two outstanding candidates, Democrat Al Gore (our slim, clean shaven VP) and Republican George W. Bush (Yale's finest cowboy and scholar) will duke it out this November. Who will best manage the $230 billion surplus? Who will appoint the brightest and most qualified to his cabinet? Who will ensure America's international reputation as leader of the free world through peace and diplomacy? All these burning questions and more will be decided in what is sure to become a legendary election. So get out there and vote, Quakers, and remember that every chad counts!
-Brian Mertens
what up, cuz?
Our American Cousin
Ford's Theatre, 511 10th Street, Washington, D.C.
April 14th, 1865, 5 cents
From the company that debuted The Marble Heart, comes Our American Cousin, an explosive new show opening this week at Washington's Ford's Theatre. Written by Tom Taylor and starring the dashing John Wilkes Booth, this three-act play is sure to amaze, inspire and surprise; it will be marked in history as one of fiery, dramatic prowess. In attendance will be President Lincoln and wife Mary Todd, celebrating Lee's surrender this past Saturday at Appomattox Court House and enjoying a relaxing evening. Our American Cousin promises to be a shocking and groundbreaking production... "The spark this damn country needs!" according to Booth, esteemed member of the theatre's actor's guild. Horse and buggy on down - what better way to spend your Good Friday?
-Adam Hartheimer
got wood?
Woodstock Music and Arts Fair
Max Yasgur's Farm
Bethel, New York
Aug. 15 to Aug. 18, 1969, Free (love)
Escape from the craziness of the city. Walk around for three days without seeing a skyscraper or a traffic light. Roam through acres of Bethel, experiencing the outdoors. Get ready to feel the music and peace. Listen to the best musicians of our time: the Who, Janis Joplin, Joe Cocker, Sly and the Family Stone, Jimi Hendrix and 27 others. Camp out; water and restrooms will be supplied. Woodstock promises to be three uncomplicated, unhurried, calm days celebrating the beauty that is music. New York officials say they will maintain order and are prepared to handle traffic, crowd control and sanitation. And remember, BYO condoms.
-Sabrina Benun
sit down, john
Signing of the Declaration of Independence
Independence Hall
320 Chestnut Street
July 2, 3 and 4, 1776, FREEDOM!
It's going to be hot as hell in Philadelphia this July as the Second Continental Congress convenes for a meeting that might actually end with a decision being reached about this whole independence thing. Our own Ben Franklin has revised the last draft of the Declaration, so hope abounds. All the heavy hitters will be there: third choice Declaration author Thomas Jefferson, stubborn John Adams and wise Ben Franklin will be joined by Hancock (who will be bringing a giant pen!), Livingston, Sherman and many, many more. So come try to peek through the windows of Independence Hall as the colonies' brightest minds come together to stick it to King George. If all goes well, it will be a clear sign from God that we should advance all the way to the other ocean, killing any locals who get in our way.
-Melissa Gad
Happily Ever After
Diana and Charles's Wedding
St. Paul's Cathedral
London
July 29, 1981, Free with invite
Set your alarm clocks, kids, because you wouldn't want a five-hour time difference to stand between you and the most romantic event of our lives. Charles and Diana are getting hitched in that crazy country where they drive on the wrong side of the road and the soldiers never smile. 600,000 people are expected to flood the streets of London, not to mention the anticipated 750 million viewers tuning in on the telly. So get psyched, because it's bound to be a royal nuptial extravaganza - a couple as much in love as Charles and Di will know how to throw down. Just think how cute their kids will be if they don't take after their father!
-Jessica Goldstein
