- Girl on Locust: I just want to be engaged by the time I graduate. Then I’ll be happy.
- Drunk Chick: I have really poor taste in friends. Really, don’t be flattered that I like you, it means there’s probably something wrong with you.
- Dude: I really shouldn’t have YouTubed “sick cat.”
- Girl: I was gonna drop acid this weekend but I’m too stressed out over internships.
- Frat guy: Yo, go to the basement and sniff the lacquer. I’m high as FUCK right now.
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Eliot Kaplan recounts his experience as Street Editor–in–Chief in 1978 and how routine brought him sanity.
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Solutions by The State News
