Blonde betch: I'm not racist. I was raised by foreigners.

English prof: How are we going to interpret the meaning of the fart? Turn to line 2206. 

Junior abroad: I was going to go shirtless and paint my body because who doesn't like to be slutty on Halloween while rolling?

TFM MBA on final paper: This sucks ball man. You have to use paragraphs, make sure everything is in the right tense .... just hire an undergrad to do it.

Gay senior: He warned me he was dressing as an Indian chief and would be slightly insensitive. And I was like, "You're ethnically ambiguous, it's okay."