Highbrow
Tweet of the Week: 02.24.2014
Vote for this week's most fabulous tweet!
Word on the Street: Four
[Trigger warning: Rape and Sexual Assault] Yesterday I turned 20. If we’re talking numbers, mine is 22.
Mythbusters: Penn Edition
As your trusted authority on Penn rumors, Highbrow is here to catch you up on some favorite stories and help you separate the fact from the crap.
Word on the Street: Picture Imperfect
[media-credit name="Eve Bowers" align="alignright" width="225"][/media-credit] I struggle with depression.
Overheard at Penn: 02.14.2014
Girl on Locust: Honestly, I am so into homosexuals.
The Round Up: 02.14.2014
Privjet, sukii! That means “Hi bitches” in Russian, the language of the Winter Olympic Games and Pussy Riot.
The Ultra-Oversimplified Guide to Relevance
Click on the image to learn whats "in and out" around campus these days:
The Round Up: 02.06.2014
To the pre-professionals whom it may concern: We see you in that Ann Taylor Loft statement necklace.
Overheard at Penn: 02.06.2014
Under the Button Editor: I was having a really good convo with this guy on Tinder until he called me a sexy Jewess.
Tweet of the Week: 02.04.2014
Tweeting in the cold is hard to do
Ask Miss Cassandra: Confronting Your Demons if You're Sensitive to Semen
Fresh from a holiday in Palm Springs, Penn’s very own sex guru has returned to answer your questions. Mama’s back, children.
Word on the Street: What's my Age Again?
“Are you a freshman?” I slurred through a vodka cranberry haze as I flirted with the first hot guy I met during NSO this semester.
Overheard at Penn: 01.30.14
Vegetarian JAP: Don’t tell anyone, but I had chicken last night. And I wasn’t drunk.
The Round Up: 01.30.14
I said BRRR. It’s cold in here. There must be some gossip in the atmosphere. The temperature may be dropping, but Highbrow is just heating up.
The Meh List: Welcome Back Edition
Our favorite moments of the beginning of spring seMEHster
Overheard at Penn 01.23.14
Penn publication editor: Who wrote this, an immigrant?
Word on the Street: Your 2014 New Year's Resolutions
Eat something for lunch other than a bagel from Mark’s/ No more sex in cabs/ Finally get with the boys on the Radian 14th floor/ Tell my thesis advisor what I really think of her/ Have sex in the bathroom of all four campus bars/ Stop farting in public/ Understand foreskin/ Stop hooking up with guys I can’t stand/ Stop pretending not to know people on Locust/ Be less bitchy to my mother/ Stop apologizing so much/ Use one weight machine at Pottruck without embarrassing and injuring myself (or others)/ Actually remember all the fun I have when I wake up the next morning/ Skinny dip in the Schuylkill/ Learn how to walk in heels/ Do something for someone else every day/ Know what is going on in the world beyond Penn/ Go to an Elmo naked party...naked this time/ Start working out during the mornings/ Stop walking from Starbucks to Van Pelt to Williams back to Starbucks looking for a place to study/ Stop walking around aimlessly in general/ Stop trying to run into that single person on Locust/ Cook more meals at home/ TEAR DOWN THE PATRIARCHY/Make THEOS irrelevant/ Ensure that the Wizard of Farts graduates so his power never sees Locust Walk again/ Stop only dating Jewish boys/ Stop hooking up with boys in the same lineage/ Stop reading CollegiateACB/ Get fucked in the ass more (or is that not highbrow enough?)/ Be fucking happy/ Have sex with a TA/ Learn that pizza isn’t a reliable friend/ Find someone to treat my tender boy pussy the right way/ Stop saying “You too” to the woman at Commons who tells me to have a good dinner/ Get gayer #nohetero/ Tell him my favorite part of the night is when he hugs me goodbye/ Get APES kicked off campus... oh wait/ Pee on Ben Franklin and not get arrested/ Take a full piss without hitting the rim or floor once/ NO MORE INSOMNIA COOKIES/ Wear my Greek letters more often/ Finally get with the boy I’ve liked since NSO freshman year/ Destroy more egos by not faking orgasms anymore/ Stop using people as social experiments/ Get head every time I give head/ Enjoy being able-bodied and young/ Read one book per week/ Eat more green things/ Don’t get ice cream after EVERY run/ Stop accidentally sending dick snapchats to my aunt/ Not pay for cheats on Candy Crush/ Cut down on my Tinder use/ Never set foot in Pike again/ Make out with a closeted frat guy at Smokes’/ Develop a consistent morning routine/ Have something that at least resembles a real relationship/ Smoke less pot and snort less cocaine/ Learn to not determine my self–worth in relation to other people/ Not accidentally make out with a 55-year-old again/ Give less fucks/ Floss.
