Michael Brett Kind is a Sophomore in the College, hailing from Chicago, well not actually Chicago, but pretty close to it, like a suburb, that's kinda north but not quite a part of it. He hopes to major in history or pursue another related and impractical pursuit which will be a nice springboard to a long 20 year career of professional studentship. He is also left-handed which means he will probably go to Hell. Michael tends to say "Please" a lot. Since he's socially awkward, he smiles and giggles nervously. In sum, if Michael could just lose that "What is he trying to prove?" thing, and gain an inch in height, he would be cool. So here are some legendary quotes from an almost cool guy.
"To the fool, the years seem long, to the wise they seem the same."
"Today is a day that will live in infamy. Sorry if it's your birthday."
"Does the squirrel make the times or do the times make the squirrel?"
"Early to bed, early to rise, makes you lonely in college."
"Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day, teach him to fish and he may be repulsed by the idea of eating fish."
"Athleticism is the natural selection of youth."
"Football is a lot like life. Except that in one you play with balls."
"No taxation without evasion."
"That government is best which governs best."
"I don't do homework, because then the system wins"
