With so many tricky social situations, it can be tough to maintain proper decorum. Here are two experts from opposite ends of the earth (one goes to Drexel and one goes to Penn) to give you their advice on everything from dating to dinner parties. It’s about time you brushed up on your etiquette!

What is proper attire for a dinner party?

Drexel Gent: Well, it depends on what I’m gonna be drinkin’. If it’s beer, then I’m going to wear my Eagles hat, duh. If it’s that spendy vod, like my boys Nik or Vlad, I’m going to wear my Phillies hat. If its wine, gotta go with the Sixers hat, keepin’ it classy like Elton Brand!!! And if it’s that 4Loko… definitely wearin’ that Flyers hat. 4Loko is Spanish for “fucking crazy,” just like hockey games. Quaker Cad: Here’s the secret to my success: I wear a tuxedo to every party. I never have to fuss about the dress code, and thankfully I haven’t grown since my Bar Mitzvah, which was James Bond themed! People just see you and think: “Wow, a tuxedo. That must be an interesting person.” Give it a try sometime, but not if it’s a party I’ll be at! Seriously though — it’s the only reason anyone talks to me.