The boys of AXO’s annual philanthropy event, Big Man On Campus, are back. This year, they’re taller, they’re hairier and, let the record show, they’re all afraid of Dhamaka.

Street: What makes you a true BMOC? 

Ben Slocum: Chest hair. Uninhibited.

Jason Maccabee: I’m not afraid to get naked. And I’m able to eat candy corn at any time of the year.

Trevor Cassidy: Body language.

Andrew Green: How you read other people, or how you present?

Russell Abdo: It’s a lot of reading.

TC: It’s both! It’s a conversation without words.

Ben Andrew Whitenack: Well, I am really big in person. I’m 6’6” when I first wake up in the morning.

Ainesh Ravi: Oh, wow.

BAW: Gravity shrinks me down, though.

AR: I’d say sociability for me?

Harrison Cook: I’m probably the most handsome contestant.


Street: Why are you going to win BMOC? 

BS: I’m probably not.

JM: That’s the spirit!

TC: As long as I don’t come in last, I’m pretty down with that.

BS: I bought my routine on Gilt.

JM: For the record, Slocum’s drunk.

AR: Just gonna go with dancing on this one. That’s all I got.

HC: My girlfriend will dump me if I don’t.


Street: Who’s your biggest competition? 

JM: Trevor!

BS: Yeah, Trevor!

RA: Trevor.

AM: No, the Dhamaka guy! Ainesh!

AR: I have some moves.


AM: That’s not fair. He dances for a living!

AG: Let’s accept it right now. We’re all going to lose that. We can’t dance as well as Dhamaka, so we have to be sexual or funny or something.


Street: What’s your secret weapon for winning? 

HC: I’ll have all the goons from ATO there to cheer for me. If you refer to them as “goons” they’ll like that.

AR: Um, I guess swag on stage.

BAW: Swag on stage? Damn, I can’t compete with that.

AM: I made an underwear calendar freshman year. I think I’m going to rerelease the photos. You’ll see a younger man—but don’t worry, he’s over 18.

JM: A stuffed bathing suit.

TC: I have a pretty luscious team of backup dancers.

AS: That’s such a politically correct answer! That’s what the world wants to hear.

JM: “I was lifted up by my backup dancers.”

RA: Let the record show I took two of Trevor’s backup dancers from last year, when he won.


Street: How would you define manhood in one word? 

TC: Anchorman.

AM: Facial hair.

BS: That’s two words.

JM: That’s, like, double the word count.

RA: If you say it really fast it can be one word, like, “fashuhair.”

BS: Woah, shit just got real. Puberty.

JM: I’m taking “Puberty.”

BS: No, Ben Slocum said “puberty!”

JM: No, fuck him—he’s drunk!

TC: Is there a word for if one ball is bigger than the other?

HC: Sticktoitiveness. Stick–to–it–ive–ness.

BAW: I’ll say confidence for mine.

AG: Confidence.

AR: I would go for “quick thinking” here, but I clearly don’t have that.

HC: You can say “quickthinkingiveness.”

AR: Alright, “quickthinkingiveness.”


Street: Who’s your favorite Disney Princess and why? 

RA: Mulan! The obvious answer.

TC: Jasmine. She’s, like, the first ethnic–ass princess.

RA: Yeah, but Mulan did it better.

BS: Who’s the new one?

JM: I’ll take “Princess and the Frog.”

BS: Damnit! That’s what I wanted.

JM: Do you even know her name, though?

TC: Her name’s Tiana.

AG: Ariel. She’s fucking crazy.

AM: Belle. She’s a classic.

AR: Gonna go with Jasmine on this one. She’s Indian. She’s gorgeous. The long, flowing hair gets me.

BAW: Princess Fiona, because she’s Cameron Diaz. She’s really great, and she’s cool with looking like a princess or an ogre.

HC: Cinderella. She started from the bottom.


Street: There are two types of people at Penn…

BS: Those that buy from Pizza Rustica, and those that don’t.

JM: People who lived in King’s Court, and people who didn’t.

RA: People that are regulars at Evan’s Pizza, and people who aren’t.

AM: The Blarney’s vs. Smokes crowd is a classic.

HC: NARPs and athletic people.

AR: I’ve never heard of “NARP” before. I used to do track though.

BAW: I guess I’m a NARP right now, too.

HC: Yeah, technically.

AR: We’re has–beens. We’re washed up.


Street: How will you prepare for BMOC?


JM: I’ll need a bear cub. Where can I find a competitive bear club?

BS: Diet Coke, Sweetgreen and HipCityVeg.

JM: Let the record show that Slocum’s in SDT. Slocum Delta Tau. Put that in.

TC: I’d probably marathon “Mob Wives” just to get the show’s competitive spirit. “Ya don’t want fuckin’ love comin out ya jugular. Ya gonna get your jaw wiped Maccabee!“

RA: I’ll prepare with a lot of picklebacks. It’s a shot of whiskey chased by pickle juice.

AG: Lots of underground dance fighting.

AR: I’m gonna get a gymnastics gym and work on my flips. If I can get that down.

BAW: Damn. I’m intimidated.

HC: If I say karaoke and squatting deep, will you print that?


Street: What is one reason people should see BMOC?

JM: Support the troops?

AM: Women’s rights.

TC: It’s for fucking charity.

BS: Let’s start a list, guys. For America, women’s rights… get God in there.

AG: Our lord and savior, Jesus Christ.

TC: Everyone’s parents.

AR: Well, it’s a good cause. A good cause and seeing 24 shirtless men dance.

HC: You can hang out with the brothers of ATO. The goons.

BAW: I don’t see any downside to it. It’ll be fun. It’s a good cause. We’re gonna make fools of ourselves.






All comments eligible for publication in Daily Pennsylvanian, Inc. publications.