Walls We Really Need on Campus

Dear President Gutmann, please build these walls.

Surrounding the button to protect it from rampant cigarette smoke billowing out of Europeans and English majors.
Between Ben & Jerry’s and Hip City Veg, to keep the vegans from rioting against those audacious enough to consume dairy.
Encircling the biopond to make true greenhouse (aka hotbox the shit out of it).
Separating the two bunks in Class of 1928, Room 207 in the quad. Melissa and Alayna really need their space after the incident with the can opener.
Split the Towne building into East and West Towne recreate the splitting of Berlin!
Covering all the doors into DRL.
Between Zete and Hill, since they really shouldn’t be looking at each other that much.

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