Street Sweeper

After a week off, let's jump right back in: As our lovely Ego editors would say, Halloween is the new Chanukah, as this year's festivities stretched on an entire week, and in some circles, even more. We'll spare you the gritty details since you know them already, but suffice to say that "Slutty Maccabi" was not among the more popular costumes on frat row. In brief, however, one Philadelphia blogger described the scene as a "smart asian slut halloween paradise," and noteworthy costumes included: the "snake" charming Indian Fakir, post-depression Britney, the Lee's Hoagie House delivery guy, and one Über-fabulous emulator of Bruno, who interviewed and accosted many of Allegro's wasted patrons at 2:30 in the morn. Still unclear whether he was truly looking for a schwanzenstück in his stinker. Ach ja... November, unfortunately, means a capella, but at least this year we've got something to get us through the misery. Despite claiming to be Penn's "premier all-male a capella group" on their website, the Chord On Blues have run away with ivygateblog.com's contest to find the worst a capella group in the Ivy League. Their rendition of Daft Punk's "Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger" resulted in YouTube death threats to their rotund lead singer, and has sparked discussion on the blog itself amongst stupid freshmen at Yale. Unfortunately, it appears the group has for some reason become self-conscious, and the video is no longer available. Worst in the Ivies at the Ivies' Worst Thing? Well, at least it will give their spring concert some buzz. Trick or Treat: SAE's Halloween party ends amidst blaring fire alarms and inter-fraternal conspiracy. White Dog Cafe attempts to poison 34th Street contributor; guess who won't make it into the Best of Penn. Kappa Sig Kentuckian falls into Delaware River at Sigma Kappa/Sammy's Rock Steady; almost as embarrassing as the Chord on Blues. Rainbow Bright UA Senior conspicuously boots and rallies in Smoke's bathroom, finally lives up to pledge of truly representing student body. Austin Peña concludes month-long diet in preparation for BMOC... LSD-induced cuddle puddle breaks out at Theo's Palmer Social; cokeheads get bored quickly, head for bathroom... Owls senior boots non-VIP members from the front row of Dzine2Show's latest walk, replaces people with obnoxious stickers and his own inflated ego. Finally, the Sweeper sends some love out to one flamboyant sophomore, who was overheard about town and at PiLam and Elmo's "So Much Dancing" Saturday night in top form. Among his highlights: - Standing in front of his bedroom door: "This is an application process motherfucker." - About his friend's roommate: "My parents said, 'your body is'. what do you call it? It's continuous, perpetual, it's just SEX. My parents told me to have sex with you." - Pointing out a poster in his room: "The world is what we live in." - To the bouncers at the party: "You're the establishment, enjoy your power trip." - He then proceeded to put his face in a huge woman's vagina on the dance floor, and get kicked out for being too drunk. As any good man would do, he then went home and pulled a bottle of Banker's from the freezer. May we all aspire to such greatness -- especially our Big Men, keep stuffing those thongs. C U Next Thursday!