Girl in choker at the Writer's House: The overarching structure of fiction is phallic. It rises and levels.
Frat guy to a sophomore girl: I'm bringing a freshman to my date night. Sorry. Freshmen are thirstier.
Delancey Boy: Is life even worth living without Pellegrino?
Boy trying to pick up an imaginary friend in college hall: Do you want my whipped cream?
Nasally freshman girl on Locust: I thought Xanax was supposed to be elegant.