Campus Life
Texts From Last Night: Spring Break edition
(857): I watch more porn than I watch movies. (714): God I would jam you so hard (714): U know I’m hot as fuck (714): I don’t jerk to ppl who think I’m ugly (714): Dude ur totes buying condoms at the mall (510): Spring breakers is actually pretty accurate cause I wanna kill like everyone in Miami right now (510): Fuck I literally accidently texted my ex instead of you asking him “where he at in this gay club” (646): I don’t think I’m alive anymore...I just puked 5 times before 1pm (773): My burn finally turned to tan!! Just in time to peel off...it now looks likes splotty third nipple (508): My strep rash cleared just in time to get sunburnt (734): You’d think we’d get drunk and do something fun but we just got drunk and played monopoly (215): Damn mtha fackacs (516): She had a nipple piercing and a tramp stamp but told me not to worry because she got both when she 15.
Highbrow Does Grindr
Week two of Highbrow's immersion into the complicated world of dating apps.
Ego's Spring Reading List
Leave the textbook at home for an afternoon: trade it for a good, old–fashioned book.
Ego of the Week: Seth Simons
This Boston native inspires all sorts of feels as a playwright, Simply Chaos comedian and Excelano Project spoken–word poet. Seth excels in reading and writing, but he prefers birdwatching over arithmetic (we don’t blame him).
The Roundup: 3.20.2014
Welcome back to Penn–adise, muchachos. Sorry you have to trade your bikinis for winter parkas. While the weather may be cold and cloudy, Highbrow is here to bring the sunshine back into your lives.
Top 10 Lies You Told Yourself Before Break
1. I’ll write my paper before I go.
Tweet of the Week: 03.05.2014
Spring break will totally come faster if you vote for a tweet
Top 10 Alternative Spring Break Diets
Spring Break is coming up, kiddies! If you don’t have time (or energy, or desire) to cut back the cals, Ego has some better suggestions.
Word on the Street: Sharing Semen
Walking out of VP on Saturday afternoon, I had five new Grindr messages. Booyah. Three messages were from an old “professional type” looking for a twinky college boy, and the others were from a steamy grad student in the School of Design.
Letter from the Editor: 02.27.2014
In part two of my tween–obsession saga (for those of you following along, yes, I’m still listening to One Direction), I have a crush on a group of teenage–boy Vine stars. Rereading that sentence made me gag a little.
Highbrow Does Tinder
This week, Highbrow decided to venture into the world of modern love and see what all the kids are talking about. Swipe right, bitches.
Overheard at Penn: 02.27.2014
Theta frosh: Siri, where's Oz? A's boy: Who the fuck doesn't have Uber?! Girl on Locust: I may have egged a house once. VP security guard: I ooze flowers. Blonde girl: I just feel like I get really fucked up and suck dick at every date night.
The Roundup: 02.27.2014
One more week until Highbrow packs its bags and heads for paradise. Yes ducklings, it’s almost our favorite time of year: SPRING BREAK!
Ego of the Week: Emily Rubin
This Nightingale Nurse may be a tinder tease, but she’s DFA, down for anything. You can find her under the button—get your mind outta the gutter! She’ll be filming “The Button Show with Emily Rubin”
