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Guides
Save Ferris An 80's Fundraiser for the Red Cross Suite 450 450 N. 6th St. Thu, 10 p.m.-2 a.m., $10 on the Walk, $15 at the door Remember that Cubs game?
Guides
Deep C Tragos 38 S. 19th St. Sat, 10 p.m., Free (215) 636-9901 This new Spanish-themed toro club is guaranteed to make you feel like you're in Spain.
Dance!
Fluid is a club with the rare ability to deliver solid theme nights throughout the week featuring a variety of music for an eclectic crowd.
Final Frontier
Located at 1026 Arch Street in Chinatown, this ironically titled institution has been essential to the young artists' movement in Philadelphia.
Thugz mansion
If you weren't looking for Cue Records, you would miss it. A block away from South Street's hysteria, the store's crumbling, dull blue fa‡ade attracts little attention.
Guides
Children's Japanese Storytelling and Activities Morris Arboretum of the University of Pennsylvania Chestnut Hill Thu, 10 a.m.
Nifty Nails
For quality nailcare and general upkeep, one does not need to hit up downtown, or even leave campus for that matter.
What to Wear - Thongs
After being immortalized in a Sisqo classic, ass-flossing is no longer for drag queens and women of the night.
Guides
4 Play Thursdays The Five Spot 5 S. Bank St. Thursdays, 10 p.m., $5 (215) 574-0070 www.thefivespot.com I've actually been to this mess, and it's a sad wannabe affair.
Yarn!!!!
Knitting is back. Women who burned their bras in the '70s now join knitting circles; the knitting guidebook Stitch 'N Bitch sells out at Urban Outfitters.
Anal beads? Yes, Please
Upon entrance to this tucked-away Old City boutique, one is instantly struck by an unlikely collision of class and flash.
It's about the culture
We are all tired of cabbing it all the way down to South Street for a new deck or our favorite skateboarding inspired fashion.
Delaware Flair
Do not be fooled by the unglamorous facade of this Delaware Avenue dance party mecca. On the inside, the club's decor is as flashy as the clubbers who go there.
Guides
Family Affair Fridays Tragos 38 S. 19th St. Fridays, 10 p.m.-2 a.m., Free (215) 636-9901 Clubbing makes a great family outing.
Big women, big lust
If you like seeing fat crazy women jerk off onstage, then River Huston has made a play for you. The latest work from antiheroine extraordinaire Huston, Sex, Cellulite & Large Farm Equipment, is an abrasive, offensive, honest and necessary look at life from the perspective of a woman who has quite literally done it all.
Guides
Collateral Damage: Echoes in Our Soul Painted Bride Art Center 230 Vine Street Thu-Sat, 10 a.m., Free (215) 925-9914 www.paintedbride.org Having just now understood that Collateral Damage means the tragedy of bystanders who happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time during war, I now finally understand the obviously intended irony of the title of the 2002 Schwarzenegger movie.
Shiva of the seas
Advancements in Naval warfare have long since condemned battleships to the annals of history and the docks of scenic Camden, NJ.
God, I love trash
Imagine what it's like being a career artist -- spending one's waking hours searching for inspiration while fighting vague detachment with interminable boozing.
Let's Get Free
Philadelphia's National Liberty Museum is intriguing with avant-garde exhibitions on everything from religious tolerance to the civil rights movement.

