Girl washing celery, carrots, and cucumbers in Fisher Bennett basement women’s bathroom: I'm making salad.

Kid in Huntsman Forum: I founded, like, 8 non-profits in high school and Social Impact Consulting didn’t take me?

Freshman girl on urgent phone call: Is there a party at Crows? We like Crows. (Ed. note: wrong bird, it’s called Owls)

Contemplative SWUG: Is it sad that I’ve come to the point with Elite Daily that I have my favorite writers on it that I follow to see when they post new things?

Misunderstood bellydancer: I took pre–workout supplements with vodka one time and I ended up home, naked and hugging a pole.