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(11/01/17 3:38am)
The day before my first classes at Penn, I attended two ceremonies: Convocation and an impromptu memorial service. A close friend from high school, John, had died in a plane crash the previous night. A boy on my hall held my hand as I cried during Disney Acapella’s rendition of “I Will Find My Way” from Hercules. We didn’t really know each other, but we didn’t really know anyone. I had arrived on campus four days earlier, ready to spend the next few weeks making the lifelong friends Amy Gutmann promised in her opening speech. Instead, I’d spend them coping with the loss of one. Afterwards, the Class of 2018 jammed the gates of the Quad, laughing, chatting, shaking hands. I swiped in with the rest and retreated to the unpacked boxes of my room.
(12/02/17 2:30pm)
Smokes’ quizzo: it’s the best of times, it’s the worst of times. It’s a forum for Penn students to exercise their competitive nature AND to drink. Things can get...messy.
(10/30/17 4:47am)
Many, many letters ago (maybe even in my first one), I wrote about my high school paper column, "Oh Really?" For one of those installations, I wrote a long satire piece about depression and anxiety. And while using satire to talk about mental health sounds a little counterintuitive, it was the only way I could verbalize the complicated feelings that I'd long struggled with. After sending it to my best friend, the only person I really ever talked to about mental health in high school, I quietly tucked it away. The column never saw the light of day because I eventually chose not to publish it. I never looked at it again until about roughly twenty minutes before writing this letter, almost exactly four years later.
(10/30/17 4:22am)
This year, I stopped stockpiling transfer application essays, which made me realize that I haven’t been happy here since my freshman year.
(10/27/17 9:57pm)
With Halloween and its accompanying deluge of parties quickly approaching, students are scrambling to find cheap and reasonably revealing #looks. Fortunately, Highbrow’s here for you. We’ve thought up some costume’s that scream "I'm not confident enough to just wear lingerie and cat ears." And for inspiration, we looked no further than Penn's campus and its many inhabitants.
(11/01/17 2:58am)
Realist: It’s sad because nobody is gonna tell him his beats suck just cause he’s in Theos.
(10/26/17 7:31pm)
Just when you thought the passive–aggressive dick measuring contest was mostly channeled into beer chugging and “ratio” calculations, fraternity life at the University of Pennsylvania has found yet another highly contested but dubiously impactful, ranking system—Greek Rank.
(10/24/17 5:41pm)
Finally, the spookiest weekend of the year is upon us: Halloweekend. It's the one time of the year when the term "dressing up" doesn't mean business formal in the Penn vernacular. To make this weekend even more scary, it is also falls on Family Weekend.
(10/31/17 8:01pm)
At Penn, Paul DiNapoli (C '17) had a reputation for making things happen. As SPEC Concert Director, he helped bring Chance the Rapper, Kesha, and Zedd to Penn's concerts and Spring Flings. Now, he's taken on a different role.
(10/18/17 2:14am)
Drunk Owls guy: “Let me know when you’re done with these nice New York Jews and you’re ready for a sketchy international Jew.”
(10/12/17 7:42pm)
Although overshadowed by the illustrious Amy G, Dean of Admissions Eric J. Furda is a Penn administrator that all undergrads here have had the pleasure of interacting with in one way or another. However, the man is hard to find, and unless you are camped outside of 1 College Hall, you probably won’t get to know him very well in your years at Penn. So let Highbrow do the digging, and let’s all learn a little more about Penn’s sceniest dean of admissions.
(10/12/17 8:04pm)
THE TEN PHASES OF THE PENN PLAGUE
(10/11/17 3:05am)
All the single ladies? Well, some of 'em. We asked you to nominate Penn's Most Eligible Bachelorettes, and after much discussion, deliberation, and a fair amount of Facebook–stalking, the results are in. These ladies are smart, savvy, and single—so hey, at least you've got a chance.
(10/10/17 7:56pm)
As I stumbled into Allegro Pizza at 2 a.m., an important question came to me: who is Allegro? At that moment, I made it my personal mission to find out who the man is behind the slice of cheese and pepperoni that I routinely devour in ten seconds tops.
(10/16/17 12:34am)
With the mid-semester slump upon us, these are the drinks necessary to power you through your long days (and nights) of studying.
(10/18/17 2:06am)
“You are the most interesting person at the party.”
(10/09/17 10:26pm)
Adjusting to life at Penn isn’t easy, especially when it comes to joining clubs and other extracurriculars. But don’t worry, everyone finds their place! Don’t believe us? Just take a look at these fellow freshies you’ll be seeing at GBMs and practice:
(10/09/17 10:23pm)
Highbrow knows you don’t really mean half of the things you say. Whether it’s to avoid an awkward situation, get ahead of your peers, or to serve as one of those classic Freudian defense mechanisms, we hear you. In fact, we have a pretty good idea of what you really mean when you engage in this type of frivolous rhetoric. Please see the guide below to keep yourself well informed on the underlying meanings of your colleagues’ false claims.
(10/04/17 12:27am)
Imagine your stereotypical stoner: old hoodie, grease–stained sweatpants, and red, burnt out eyes. This is not what Marc* (C '18) looks like, especially not in his sleek, suited–up profile picture. But Marc's a daily marijuana smoker—or, at least, he was, before he decided to OCR.
(09/29/17 9:31pm)
Steve Markowitz (W’10) didn’t exactly fly under the radar during his years at Penn. The AEPi brother played Spring Fling and snagged a job at Google, all while cultivating an alter ego: Hoodie Allen.
