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Freud -- to a tune
Moss Hart, Kurt Weill and Ira Gershwin must have had copies of Hamlet firmly in hand while collaborating on Lady in the Dark. The protagonist of this 1941 musical, Liza Elliott, is repeatedly faulted as a woman who, like our favorite Dane, "can't make up her mind." For Penn's Theatre Arts Program, Lady in the Dark represents an ambitious undertaking.
Guides
A Reading With Joshua Gamson Giovanni's Room 345 S. 12th St. Thu, 5:30 p.m., free (215) 923-2960 Wondering what's on the agenda this week at our friendly gayborhood LGBT bookstore?
Do you pronate?
With the plethora of sports-gear vendors like eastbay.com, City Sports, Footlocker and even the shop at Pottruck, one might wonder, "Why should I schlep downtown to five-month-old Philadelphia Runner?" Well, aside from the fact that you can lunch at nearby Brasserie Perrier, visit Runner because its not just a runner's store, but a runner's "community." According to owner and manager Bryan Mahon, his goal for the store "is to become the Town Square of Philadelphia's runners' community," selling not only merchandise, but better yet, "knowledge, service and enthusiasm." All of the staff are serious runners, and assess customers' feet type and stride in order to fit them with the best shoe.
Guides
Fiber Artists: Emily Richardson/Nelda Warkentin Gross McCleaf Gallery 127 S. 16th St. Thu, 10 a.m.
Funkin' 'a'
One, two, three and four, five, six, seven, and eight." These sounds of drilling dancers to perfection are the first things I hear above my own desperate gasps for air as I scale the steps of Pottruck Fitness Center (perhaps it's been a little too long since I last visited the gym) to watch Strictly Funk's reherse for their spring show.
Thank you Jesus
It is no coincidence that America's first candy shop -- Shane Candies Company -- is also the site of the printing of America's first Bible.
I don't Heart Huckabees
It's hard not to feel ripped off when you go into the Penn Bookstore to buy Hamlet (which you know you already own at home anyway) and find all the used copies gone, forcing you to pay the full $10 for a play you probably already know by heart.
Guides
Pain-Fashion Slought Foundation 4017 Walnut Street Thu, 6:30 p.m. - 8 p.m., free http://slought.org/content/11267/ This discussion will address various forms of expression in the fashion world including anorexia, drugs, alcohol and food.
Choco Taco
Situated on South Street between a porno and a florist shop is Guacamole, a more urban and less expensive version of Urban Outfitters.
Rocketman in flight
Situated nicely on Philadelphia's most colorful street sits one of the city's most eclectic record stores.
Guides
John Pompetti B Square Gallery 614 S. 9th St. Thu, 1:30 p.m.-7 p.m., Fri-Sat, 12 p.m.-6 p.m., free (215) 625-0692 I don't know about you, but my favorite art is the kind that's plain and simple, with none of that pseudo-intellectual horseshit.
Hypocrisy Democracy
Envision the town of Sanctimony as perhaps a modern-day Pleasantville, where superficiality is one's savior, everyone feigns composure to avoid the town's scrutiny and nobody has a damn clue where life is going.
We heart the amish
It's almost hard to believe that only 10 minutes from campus, tucked inside an old train station downtown, is a culinary treasure that can rival any farmer's market in the country and put Penn's food cart collection to shame.
Sex, freud, and disney
What were you doing when you were 14 years old? Possibly spending your days playing a little GoldenEye on N64 until your new bedtime at 11 p.m.? Or girls, were you experiencing the joys of puberty and adolescence?
Guides
David Bunn: Double Monster Temple Gallery 45 N. Second St. Thu, 11 a.m. - 6 p.m., free (215) 925-7379 Like art?
Guides
Aaron McGruder: The Boondocks Free Library of Philadelphia 1901 Vine Street Thu, 8 p.m., $6 215-686-5322 Who doesn't love the Sunday comics?
Get addicted
Females at Penn are always on a mission. They're on a mission to use every tool at their disposal to get free drinks and to find just that one nice boy at Penn who is not so metrosexual that he knows the layout of Kiehl's better than she does.
Debauchery in the city
Who's afraid of Virginia Woolf indeed? Well, one may think, "Hey, I'm not!" from looking at the small stage of the Walnut Street Theater located between 8th and Walnut.
Heart-shaped bikini wax
Take a break from class and treat yourself to a day at the Body Klinic. Obsession is not an overstatement when referring to this place.

