Blonde 1: Honestly, fuck TFA! Blonde 2: Yeah! You can always apply for Teach for Chile with me. Blonde 1: Yeah!!!!! Oh… you were serious?

Desperate on Locust: I don’t know. He said it was a nice restaurant, so I’m dry cleaning my prom dress.

Girl 1: And then it was sooo gross. James Franco had to, like, chew through his own arm. Girl 2: OMG that’s the nastiest thing I’ve ever heard in my entire life. I may throw up. Anyways… wanna go to Chipotle?

Guy in ABP: So, what item that’s going to make me grow a vagina should I purchase today?


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