Aired on 06.24.2014
1. “Do you need anything else?” Now that Mrs. D is dead, we get a montage of Ali’s depression. Don’t worry, her hair and makeup look perfect throughout. There’s a chilling scene where Ali gets dressed for the funeral in the same dress her mother wore to hers, which is pretty heartbreaking and fucked up. Ali is weirdly spooked by a painting in the funeral home. We’ll have to wait and see what that’s all about. Because of the circumstances and out of habit, the girls treat Ali as if she’s the queen of England and they are her ladies in waiting. Speaking of girl-on-girl worship, Emily has a swim groupie who adds very little to the episode.
2. “It’s also slippery.” Melissa still has a secret that’s pretty much the only one in the show right now. (Besides the tiny questions of Mrs. D’s killer and the body in Ali’s grave.) Melissa is not down to be associated with Ali’s family, even though Spencer reminds her that they are actually one big (not at all happy) family. Melissa doesn’t buy Spencer’s blood is thicker than water mantra, and neither does Mr. Hastings, who is looking to sell the house ASAP.
3. “This is what it’s like to live in a haunted house.” The girls figure out Jason’s alibi for the night of his mother’s murder, since the Philly apartment is a place he went to get sober. He warns Spencer not to trust their father, as he is packing up to leave. So, Jason probably wasn’t the recipient of the “I can’t protect you anymore” email, but whoever was most likely got the message in person. And maybe killed Mrs. D in return?
4. “No crimes here” Ezra is back in Rosewood to recuperate with a cane that seems super fitting for his older man/stuck-in-the-wrong-time-period personality. Aria and Ali both visit him. Aria confesses to killing Shana, and Ali calls him out on keeping his info on the girls. He wants to use it to help Aria, which might have been a good idea a long, long time ago. In an unintentionally ironic line, he tells Aria that there are “no crimes” in his apartment. Minus the crimes of a teacher sleeping with his underage student, invading her privacy and stalking her. But apparently, that’s totally over now.
5. “The secret to becoming unforgettable.” Throughout the episode, Hanna has flashbacks to her journey from hefty Hanna to Ali-wannabe with Mona’s. There is a hilariously ridiculous scene where the duo walks down the halls with a song about “killer babes” in the background. She has a mini identity crisis and equates losing weight to coming out (is that PC?). The final scene shows her in a hair salon, asking for a change. Have no fear blonde-enthusiasts, the preview shows her looking exactly the same.
