Chi Rho Upsilon:
Hasn’t had a party in four years. They had a party once, but no one came and the potato salad got cold.
Sigma Alpha Delta:
After taking several gluten–free members, this somber fraternity no longer serves beer
Sigma Upsilon Xi:
During mixers all the girls just talk to Steve. Steve’s girlfriend left him two months ago and he’s been really depressed lately. Some girls find broken sexy, but Steve isn’t sexy. He’s just broken.
Delta Iota Kappa:
Snuggles, the frat dog, has lung cancer (probably from all those cigar nights). They can’t do anything for him. All frat dogs go to heaven, right?
Sigma Tau Delta:
During rush there were five Bens. Loved two, hated three. Took the wrong Bens.
Omega Mu Gamma
Sometimes it's hard being a bro, especially when your house burned down.
