Assassination Tango should be good.ÿ Under the deft hand of Robert Duvall -- who directs, produces and stars in the film -- this labor of love should be a masterpiece.ÿThe film, however, falls short of these expectations.ÿThe ingredients are there, but they end up producing a lot of nothing -- unless you enjoy staring at one pointless scene after another for two hours, that is. The movie plods along to a conclusion that can't come soon enough.
Assassination Tango stars Robert Duvall as John J., a geriatric hit man sent to Argentina to assassinate a corrupt general -- a move which forces him to leave his girlfriend and pseudo-daughter. When complications arise that turn his three-day stay into three weeks, he learns the value of loved ones and the danger his line of work imposes on both himself and his family.ÿWow.ÿTalk about staggering profundity. While in Argentina, John J. hooks up with a hot Argentinean dancer, Manuela (Luciana Pedraza, Duvall's real-life girlfriend), who teaches him the electrifying art of the tango. Through her, John J. develops a mild obsession with the sensuous dance. While Pedraza's tango scenes resonate throughout the rest of the film, -- one of the few saving graces of the whole crappy spectacle -- the same can't be said for Pedraza's wooden acting. All that can really be said is this: run.ÿSave yourself.