Dixie Dregs Theater of the Living Arts 334 South Street Thu, April 24, 9 p.m. $25 adv/ $28 dos www.ticketmaster.com I do not completely understand when musicians disband and then get back together about twenty years later. The Dixie Dregs bring back that southern jazzy rock that used to make audiences quiver back in the 70's. Did I just use part of Style P line? My bad, folks, I may well be a gangster and a gentleman simultaneously, but I do not intend to fashion my wordplay after The Lox member. Holiday Styles cannot compare to the Dixie Dregs in sick nonchalance, lyrical brilliance, or mental balance. Verizon Music Festival with Musiq and Aries Electric Factory 421 North 7th Street Fri, April 25, 8:30 p.m. $25 www.electricfactory.net The real reason I put this event in here is because Verizon is my phone service, and frankly Verizon has been fun times thus far. I used to have Cingular, but they suck. Even though Verizon made me pay a lot of money for a cell phone that they are now practically giving away for free, and they made me pay full price for a new phone when I lost mine, I'm still a loyal customer. Damn you, Verizon Wireless! Anyway, festivals are always a lot of fun, and this one doesn't take place outside in the blistering heat. They're so good to us. Ken Kweder and The Men From Wawa Tin Angel 20 South 2nd Street Fri, April 25, 9 p.m. $12 (215) 928-0978 I don't know what it is with people from this area and Wawa. First of all, in Chile, a wawa (though it is spelled gua-gua, but pronounced wa-wa) means baby. So, right off the bat, that name is ridiculous. But, I mean, basically Wawa is a damn 7-Eleven with a different name, and, maybe, just maybe, a little bit cleaner. Seriously, you people need to get some real supermarkets, and stop running around like a bunch of snow is going to kill you. Nothing that you can play in will harm you, okay? Try hurricanes on for size. Ugh, Northerners. Damn you, Ken Kweder. The Doors Tower Theatre Ludlow and 69th Streets Sat, April 26, 8 p.m. $47.50-$95 @Filmtimes Text: I can't lie, Jim Morrison was one hot tamale, and I generally don't like Val Kilmer, but he played one damn good Morrison. Anyway, Jim won't be at this show. In fact, most of the original band won't be there, and thus this may not be as exciting to you. That's why I think they should bring in like the ghost of Jim. Now, I am scared as hell of ghosts, so I wouldn't be caught dead at the show (ha!), but some of you may enjoy it. Plus, Jim Morrison was hot, so it's a win-win situation. Kimmel Center Youth Jazz Ensemble Commonwealth Plaza 260 Broad Street Sat, April 26, 1 p.m. Free Free events usually suck, but since I'm a youth myself I say why not bother waking up before 1 p.m. after a drunken soiree and attending this event in support of youth jazz ensembles across America. This is our chance to be Patriotic or to show that even Penn students like free things. Penn could at least give us each a tee shirt with all that tuition we pay. Now you made me want a free tee shirt. Vivian Green Theater of the Living Arts 334 South Street Sat, April 26, 9 p.m. $17 adv/ $20 dos www.ticketmaster.com Reppin' the Illadelph to the fullest, Ms. Green's got that neo-soul flavor that trumps the horrible R&B cramming our airwaves nowadays. Green is the color of rebirth, springtime, and life. The Cornish name Vivian is derived from a locality and connotes "small water." In this sense, the literal Vivian Green ought to be a petite aquamarine-skinned lady composed of more water than your average Homo Sapiens. Oh, please submerge me in her gentle currents and soothe my eternally guilt-ridden soul. I like Neo everything: geo, classical, and natal. Blackalicious Theater of the Living Arts 334 South Street Mon, April 28, 8 p.m. $13 www.ticketmaster.com I'd like to think that I was blackalicious, but unfortunately I am not. You know who is though? Taye Diggs. I don't want to sound like a whore or anything, but did you guys check out his ass in How Stella Got Her Groove Back. Just that ass is reason enough to regain your groove. Yeah. Anyway, the first time I heard of this group I had a good laugh, and I put up their sticker right away, because I wanted people to know I was "blackalicious." Now I get to meet them. Score! Bright Eyes The Trocadero 1003 Arch Street Mon, April 28, 7 p.m. $14 You know that Donna Lewis song that has a part that goes "You've got the most unbelievable blue eyes I've ever seen." I know it's cheesy but I love that line. I want to say that to someone someday. Okay, I want to say that to Ryan Adams some day, but still. Anyway, this group/guy sounds kinda like Badly Drawn Boy, another group/guy, and my roommate mistook them/him for The White Stripes the other day. So, there you go kids, that's my description and I am sticking to it. I love you Ryan! Lifehouse Theater of the Living Arts 334 South Street Tue, April 29, 8 p.m. $17 adv/ $19 dos www.ticketmaster.com A lot of people think Lifehouse kinda sucks, but that's because the public likes to bring you up just to knock you down. Damn you people, give them a shot! Yes, the lead singer is kind of ugly, but in a hot way, and yes their lyrics are cheesy, but in a very sweet romantic, I-wanna-fuck-you-for-writing-me-that-song kinda way. Maybe it's just me. Maybe I am just a sucker for a boy with a guitar. A sucker. Ha! Let me stop while I'm ahead. Lackawanna Blues Freedom Repertory Theatre 1346 North Broad Street April 30-May 11, Various Times $15-$35 (215) 978-8497 There are 23 characters in this play. If this is just some kind of bootleg version of John Leguizamo's Freak then I think we got a problem. Not that I like him, because I don't he's super annoying. Actually I saw him once when I was on the bus home. No I did not get off. I didn't even get off when I saw Andrew McCarthy, who I had the biggest crush on when I was 6. That's right I wouldn't get off that bus for just anyone, except for maybe some really good food.