The other night my friend called to tell me she was going snowboarding with a bunch of people and I should come along.

Snowboarding in June? You've got to be kidding me!

But there I was piled into a van with a bunch of people. We arrived at the mountain to see it covered with glorious piles of fresh powder. I then realized I had forgotten my brand-new snowboard at home. The lady at the front counter told me a rental would cost $44, to which I could only say "WTF, mate?" I paid the amount, went up the lift and was about to go down the mountain, when... when...

I woke up. Crap. That was a dream? I hate when that happens. Life can be rather boring, so dreams are the ideal time to escape the mundane and pretend I have superpowers, or that I rule the planet. Sometimes I dream I can fly or even beatbox. Other times I'm a flying superhero named "The BoxManiac." I fight crime with my mad beats and rental snowboards. Once I was even an American Gladiator named Jaguar, and I whipped everyone in the Atlasphere.

I do have nightmares every now and again. When I was a child, I would get this one where I would try to turn on my Nintendo and it would keep doing that thing where it blinks on and off for hours (don't pretend like you don't know). Suddenly M.C. Hammer would come crashing through the wall and eat my goldfish. He would eat my goldfish.

Falling also seems to be a recurring theme in my dreams, and I hear it's rather common. It's great to have a dream where you're battling against some huge demon creature with twelve arms on top of a tall skyscraper and you both tumble over the edge in a blaze of fiery glory. You battle and pummel the beast on the way down and right before you hit the ground, you wake up, a hero in your own mind. But it's not great to be five years old, sleeping in the top of your bunk-bed and having a dream about falling off the jungle gym only to wake up and realize you really are falling. There's little you can do to avoid smacking your face on the hardwood floor.

What was that, Doctor? Oh, my time is up? Yes, I'll keep taking my medicine. No, I won't eat Qdoba at 2 a.m. right before I go to bed. Thanks Doc, see you next week.


Comments

All comments eligible for publication in Daily Pennsylvanian, Inc. publications.