College senior Mike Zorger knows how to work under pressure. Whether overseeing SPEC Connaissance as its director or selecting distinguished movers-and-shakers for a university-wide audience (what up, Madeleine Albright), he has what it takes to make moves on campus.
Street: What’s your favorite thing about being on SPEC? Mike Zorger: Doling out your tuition money like it’s my job. [Ed. note: It is your job.]
Street: There are two types of people at Penn... MZ: Those who actually need Xanax and those who just take it for fun.
Street: What is the most underrated thing about Penn? Overrated? MZ: Underrated: People watching. Overrated: Smoke's. Some of these people should stop and look at themselves once in a while.
Street: What is the least appreciated thing about Philadelphia? MZ: Philly Orchestra rush tickets... or the accent.
Street: What was your last purchase? MZ: A bag of sunflower seeds.
Street: You’re walking into a friend's party. What is playing in the background? MZ: “Thank God I’m a Country Boy.” Yee-haw.
Street: What is one of your guilty pleasures? MZ: Political insensitivity or a Sunday afternoon NASCAR race.
Street: Who is the coolest person you have ever met? MZ: Karl Rove.
Street: What goes in your Chipotle burrito? MZ: Oy, that’s not kosher.
Street: Smoke’s or getting smoked out? MZ: Eulogy. Between the beer selection and the fries? “Just say no,” my ass.
Street: What's the best alternative to Van Pelt? MZ: A couch, a TV and a marathon of Jack McCoy style justice.
Street: Marry, fuck, kill. Madeleine Albright, Amy Gutmann, Maya Angelou? MZ: Roses are red, Violets are blue, Poetry is kind of annoying, So the inkwell just went dry on Ms. Angelou. SPEConnaissance brought Queen Noor a few years back so I’ll quote the Kool-Aid Man here and say, “Ooooh yeahhh.” Marry Amy G or Madeline A? Neither. Whoopi Goldberg for sure though. Smart, hysterical and M.O.T. [Ed. note: “Member of the Tribe,” aka Jewish]. What more could a good Jewish boy like me ask for?
Check out Madeleine Albright at Irvine Aditorium this Saturday at 7:30 p.m., $10.
