Street: Most underrated thing about Penn? Overrated? Eliza Chute: Underrated: calling in to talk shows on WQHS. Overrated: rhombuses — they are just slanty squares.
Street: Perks of being a PennQuest Leader? EC: Belting Disney and '90s pop songs, meeting amazing people, playing baby panda on the Green, Laurie McCall and the bear bag surprise.
Street: Do you have any surprising abilities? EC: When I look at a person I can tell immediately whether or not they are Marilyn Manson.
Street: In a celebrity death match of ALLIES vs. PennQuest, who would win? EC: Considering that ALLIES (Penn’s gay/straight alliance) only participates in non-violent protests, they don’t stand much of a chance. Their only hope is that PennQuest gets distracted by something shiny, which they probably would. Then no one dies, and I still have extracurriculars to put on my resume, in the small hope that I actually get a job.
Street: What was your last purchase? EC: Fake teeth, a bag of river stones and a two-liter bottle of ginger ale — all of which can be purchased at the 40th and Market dollar store.
Street: If you could have a superpower for a day, what would it be? EC: The power to turn everything that I touch into cheese.
Street: What goes in your Chipotle burrito? EC: A Don Memo taco.
Street: Do you have a favorite poop story? EC: I’m a freaking lady! I burp rainbows and sunshine, and I poop kittens and unicorns and Lisa Frank folders. But seriously, I can’t tell you about that, because I might want to be a real person one day.
Street: You just arrived at your 10-year college reunion. What would people be most surprised to hear about you? EC: I have become the high priestess of an undiscovered Mayan village.
Street: Coolest person you have ever met? EC: Maya Angelou.
Street: Any guilty pleasures? EC: Late night eating, Nick Jonas’s earlier work and taxidermy.
