SDT hopeful during rush: Okay, but like, Chicago japs don’t compare to New York japs.

Old woman at dinner: You know what he said to me? There will only be seven planets tomorrow because I'm going to destroy Uranus.

Informed Castle rush: The Radian isn't a sorority house unless you live above the 11th floor.

Well-endowed Oz sophomore: My high school basketball coach used to call me the girthiest boy on the squad.

A’s boys to girls at Smokes’: Hey, we’re here to hit on you.