Revamped Robinhood: Feed the rich to the poor; it’s the gritty way. 

Ivy–bound Prefrosh: Are you supposed to pee on the Ben Franklin statue or is that at 


Environmental Science Prof: I recently saw an article about how climate change will end beer production… someone should tell Kavanaugh. 

Never goes past Spruce: Levin is practically in New Jersey. 

Prof of a Really Hard Class: If you are offended by an erect penis, please leave now. There will be one in this lecture. 

Guy Who is Definitely not OCRing: Consulting is just a pyramid scheme. 

Morally Questionable Wharton MBA: He wants to make more money, so his plan is to remortgage his house and stop paying for his kids. 

Brutally Honest Engineering Professor: You think you're going to graduate, and it'll get better and you won't be so stressed. But it doesn't get better.