Campus Life
Plant paparazzi
Ever since my bamboo plant "Cactus" was featured in last week's Ego section on "Best Looking Pets," my stalky companion has developed a little ego of her own.
The cat's pajamas, etc
Anxiety Wrap, $63.95 The Anxiety Wrap is a wonderful tool that helps dogs cope with past and present fear issues.
How to: Be a brandster
Frankly, we don't care who you are. Your personality bores us, as does your pathetic attempts at conversation.
You are what you wear
In prehistoric times, a person's apparel was a testament to physical agility and hunting prowess. Your apparel was only as spectacular as the animal you had the ability to kill.
Original sin
When Eve plucked the apple from the tree in the Garden of Eden so many spring seasons ago, she was hungry.
Best Dressed hipmeter
HIP Three-piece suits Lacoste t-shirts Cashmere sweaters True Religion Jeans Non-poofy North Face jackets Vans Marc Jacobs garments Tabard sweatshirts Patterned galoshes SmartWool socks Flip-flops Long underwear Poofy North Face jackets Theta sweatshirts Polo garments Fringy scarves Brand new purple Chuck Taylors Popped collars PhiSig Sweatshirts Penn clothing Abercrombie & Fitch Surf Shack T-Shirts Mavi jeans Juicy Couture garments Uggs Anne Taylor Loft garments Donovan McNabb jerseys NOT HIP
How to: Get sprung
Ever since my parents found out about the Internet, and, clever elders that they are, realized they could read my contributions to Street online, penning my Spring Break memoirs has risks.
To tan or not to tan?
It's probably a good idea not to get tanned before you get tanned (and by tanned we mean tanned and also drunk), as was initially the premise of this pre-Spring Break tanning investigation, because the whole thing is a lot more complicated than you might think.
Premature ejaculation
In 1996, when I was in seventh grade, my mother told me I dressed like a homeless person. Although the '90s saw an economic growth in the US that had never before been seen or even imagined in any country in history (never mind the 80 other countries we smashed to smithereens on our way to the top), the fashion-minded youth chose to adorn themselves with baggy flannels, tent-like Stussy T-shirts, and ragged, snaggle-cuffed JNCOs of Herculean proportions, all teeming with lice and God knows what other breed of infectious bacteria due to a generational phobia of soap and water.
Blow me hootie
The hits just keep on coming as VH1 produces yet another series that celebrates our love for analyzing life ten years at a time.
Our So-called lives
We, like, totally love Angela Chase. At the ripe age of 15, she taught us that life, love and plaid/flannel combinations -- while difficult -- are all A-OK.
Reach for the sky
You know that summer in St. Trop is only fun if you avoid the army of wrinkled German men in thongs and retreat to Les Caves du Roy nightly.
Eurobash
It's 1:20 a.m. on a Thursday night, and I've lost my dignity. I become painfully aware of this as the heel of my shoe cleaves itself between two bricks and interrupts the flow of my hopping up and down.
How to be: Eurotrash
You don't need to know where St. Tropez is to be hip. I mean, let's face it: it's going to take a lot more than that.
I see london, I see france
OK, so the Owls are a bunch of douchebags. Sure, they come from Paris and Athens -- but we're talking Texas and Georgia, not France and Greece.
Mississippi Mastectomies
Facing the Music, a collection of short stories by Mississippi native Larry Brown, is a cutting-edge interpretation of modern day relationships . Brown, who died in late 2004, infuses every character and thought with a melodic time-elapsing droll -- a tradition of Southern authors since the days of Faulkner.
How to: Be geek chic
Tina Fey. Seth Cohen. Lisa Loeb, Gwen Eudey. Face it: you've got a hard-on for geeks. From the black-rimmed glasses to their witty Friendster profiles, you go nutty for nerds.
It's hip to be square
Remember when dense, overgrown Neanderthals with biceps for brains, chest hair before the sixth grade and vocabularies consisting only of homophobic slurs and "you suck" were the Brahmin of the social hierarchy at school?
Social Darwinism
Don't be fooled by the cover of Groton-alum Curtis Sittenfeld's classy debut novel -- Prep. While the pink and green grosgrain belt around the book's middle may bring to mind your wasted summer on Nantucket or that yachtie you fondled at the Newport-Bermuda after-party, Prep's protagonist is not an elitist snob like you and I.
