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Film & TV

Don't See-Saw

Don't bother seeing Saw, a stupefyingly stupid exercise in cinematic sadism. Written and directed by two Australian newcomers, this surprise Sundance Film Festival hit spirals into convolution from scene one. Adam and Lawrence (co-writers Leigh Whannel and English hambone Cary Elwes) wake up chained to rusty pipes in an underground bathhouse, the latest victims-to-be of the Jigsaw Killer.

by JEFF LEVIN

Hit the Road Jack

Ray is this year's first great historical drama. What initially seems like a confused and chaotic film with random flashbacks and surprising images ends up being a film about this confusion and chaos.

by ROB COHEN

Wedding nights

I'm so insignificant I can't even kill myself". Sideways, directed by Alexander Payne (Election, About Schmidt), promotes itself as a "toast to wine, women, and everything that gets better with time". Miles (Paul Giamatti), a balding, neurotic divorce, and his former college roommate, Jack (Thomas Haden Church), go on a one week tour of the central coast of California.

by ALEXIS ORENSTEIN

Seas loves primer

Primer Starring Shane Carruth, David Sullivan. Directed by Shane Carruth Rated: PG-13 The smell of popcorn lingers under your nose, the sound of the stranger to your right slurping on his giant soda echoes in your ear, the feel of old gum strategically placed by the asshole who had your seat last rubs against your fingertips.

by AMANDA STACKMAN

Tongue in cheek

Shall We Dance Starring: Richard Gere, Jennifer Lopez Director: Peter Chelsom Rated: PG-13 After 19 years of marriage, John Clark (Richard Gere), an outwardly content accountant, decides he is missing something in his life.

by DEANNA PAUL

Shark tale sucks balls

Matt Stone and Trey Parker have been beacons of comedic success ever since South Park hit the screens in 1997.

by MAGGIE HENNEFELD

EPISODE III SPOILERS!!!

Star Wars Trilogy DVD Box Set, featuring Episode IV, V, VI and Special Features Starring: Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher Director: George Lucas (IV), Irvin Kershner (V), Richard Marquand (VI) Rated: PG Why has it taken so long for the original Star Wars Trilogy to come out on DVD?

by ZACH SMITH

The salem witch

When one hears the name Joan Crawford, an image of a frenzied Faye Dunaway sporting a green sleeping mask with larger-than-life eyebrows might come to mind, accompanied by the phrase, "no more wire hangers!" How could an actress whose celebrity outlasted the average movie star's by at least four decades suffer such a rapid and humiliating post-mortem decline of reputation?

by MAGGIE HENNEFELD

Billy bob is insane

Though marketed as formulaic nonsense about a high school football team that goes on to an improbable victory, Friday Night Lights is a stunner.

by EUGENE NOVIKOV

Fallon has Fallen

Taxi Director: Tim Story Starring Queen Latifah, Jimmy Fallon Rated: PG-13 Sometimes it's nice to turn your brain off and watch a shallow comedy with a brainless plotline.

by ALEXANDRA CHALAT

Rage Against the Machine

In this era of reality-obsessed film and television, it came as quite a shock that The Motorcycle Diaries has nothing to do with either leather chaps, burly biker-boys or roaming the Midwest in search of a brawl.

by ALEXIS ORENSTEIN

Fish comes out of closet

Don't bother seeing Shark Tale. Instead, watch half of Finding Nemo and chase that with a half-hour of listening to R&B.

by GERARD LEONE

Death row and sexual abuse

Any movie that is based on a self-help novel for women should be approached with caution, but Woman Thou Art Loosed succeeds in telling a story about finding peace and acceptance.

by ANNA HARTLEY

Not Rushmore

"It's kind of like this. Listen." Plucking away on a spankin' new guitar just purchased at a 7th street pawn shop, Jason Schwartzman musically describes his new film, I Heart Huckabees. Shortly after picking a string, he retunes it and giddily shows how the note ascends.

by JIM NEWELL

Insomniac, Delusional, and Operating Heavy Machinery

A skeletal Christian Bale stars as the haunted, delusional industrial worker Trevor Reznik in The Machinist, a semi-original psychological thriller that opens nationwide Oct.

by SAM HERSHEY

No One Dropped the Soap?

National Lampoon has been marketing this slightly smarmy, dare I say clever, white guy hero for decades.

by ARD LEONE

Katie Holmes is Hot

You know this is a chick flick, right?" Within three seconds of entering the theater, some random girl sitting next to me confirmed my initial doubts about First Daughter. If that were not enough, she prompted me to peruse the theater, in which I found myself a minority because I am neither under 25-years-old nor female.

by BRADLEY ERLICH

Fim

Tim Corrigan, chair of Penn's brand new Cinema Studies major, gives the program two thumbs up. Tell us about the new film major at Penn. There's been a film program and minor at Penn for about five years now.

by MAGGIE HENNEFELD

Easy to forget

There is nothing creepier than watching a movie in which the main character discovers that she is schizophrenic and has imagined every event in her life (you know you were paranoid after A Beautiful Mind). There is nothing more enthralling than watching a cheesy alien movie (you've seen Independence Day. Don't lie). The Forgotten, contrary to what one might think, is neither.

by ALEXANDRA CHALAT

Viva la Revolucion

Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow was filmed entirely in front of a blue screen, with all of the backgrounds, environments and effects added in digitally.

by EUGENE NOVIKOV

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