God, if you are a feminist please do not strike me down with your giant field hockey stick. Because, I tend to believe that for girls, hooking up is a lot more about ego, and for boys about unhooking bras. There are sexceptioptional women out there, and maybe some sensitive boys, but most of us are just dressing the part.

A roommate and personal guru of mine argues that girls don't hookup with boys, for the most part with the exclusive, if present, desire to see them naked. Whether or not this is true, I agree that clothes have a lot to do with it.

Romance and fashion present similar decisions. Both are a matter of taste. They involve a pursuit that is often determined by circumstance, impulse and style. If you're lucky you find someone or something you are attracted to, and in turn compliments you and if you're really lucky makes your ass look good.

If I learned anything, though, from the two month romance I had with a Frenchman-made pair ballet toe seer-sucker stilettos this summer; true like is hard to come buy.

The Christian Louboutin's and I met online like so many pairs do nowadays. I'd 'click to enlarge' my heels and the perfect picture of our life together at neimanmarcus.com as frequently as I'd check my e-mail. They were too tall for me to stilt to work in (or stand next to regular sized humans in general.) And also too expensive for the budget of an unpaid intern.

Still, I excused these impracticalities and frivolities. The price tag was like a birthmark or growth or lazy eye that first repulses you about your dearest, but later make them uniquely adorable. Though they eventually went on sale! And then clearance! By the time summer was over, so was the lust affair. I felt glad I exercised restraint, even if it was inadvertent.

This NSO I attempted to apply such lessons of restraint after flinging my self-respect away last Fling. Though I appreciate the pyres of underwire activists burned for the sake of sexual liberation, this has also led to expectations for the average college woman, that can feel confining. Plus no one said couture is cheap.

If a hook-up decides to go shopping elsewhere, or you collide into them getting out of a cab with another girl last Thursday night, they probably were not worth it to begin with.

Impulse buys, much like boys, can lead to remorse, so figuring out what you really need, as opposed to what you think you want, can be an important part of any relationship, healthy ego or fall rack to choose or grope. Sex in turtlenecks can be hot, even if it's just literally.


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